Let’s say your partner actually has class, it’s time to propose, which one are you saying yes to?

Maybe you aren’t in to blood diamonds and your partner actually bought you a ring that reflects your personality, what you posting on Twitter 30 seconds after?

It’s time to start planning, you’ve scoured Pinterest for 146743 hours, which color scheme are you picking?

You’ve lost 62lbs on the lemonade diet, your friends are jealous, which dress are you stunting in on your wedding day?

You actually love your friends and want your wedding pictures to look good, so you opt for the pretty bridesmaid dress, which one? Remember we love them, but it ain’t really about them...

You and bae are choosing dinner options, half of your guest really only like nuggets and fries, but you are all about culture, what’s being served?

Yes you want your cake ate on the honeymoon, but we haven’t gotten there yet, what’s your wedding cake look like?

Time to decorate the venue. When your guest walk in to be seated, what are they gonna talk shit about how they would have picked better on Instagram?

It’s time for bae to put the Nike slides and gray sweatpants away, when you make your entrance and see them crying (cause you better fucking cry), what are they wearing?

You bought your honeymoon tickets early 2020, corona had the prices super low, where you going?

You guys know me, this is really the only one that matters. Wedding night, what are you wearing? And no nothing is not an answer we gone all end up naked...

This was all in fun, please don’t be offended. If it makes you feel better I’m 33 with no proposal in sight.