The hardest part I’ve been doing in therapy since my toxic relationship is restoring trust in my own opinion and values without relying on another person’s framework to make calls on how to act. This process has influenced my politics and political expression too.

Trusting my own instincts and sense of justice again has meant that I have to also assess how that relates to political framework and alignment.
Think of it as chaotic good instead of lawful.
The implications are interesting though and often triggering.

Disagreeing with people on my own political spectrum can be a triggering process as a result and learning to be okay with the rejection that comes with that is part of my healing process.
It also means that - while I often align with leftist and progressive values - I am neither.

I consider myself an anarchist and generally distrust rules put in place - by any kind of authority that wasn’t appointed by myself and based on the values I hold. For example experts and scientists on certain topics fall into this category - I trust them because it aligns.

I do not obide anymore to ideological values imposed upon me by other people because we are supposed to be “on the same side” meaning for example leftist. There is no automatic alignment anymore - which was part of what was asked of me in my toxic relationship.

Healing from this and reconfiguring myself like that also means I’m learning to give myself the permission to be:
- wrong and learning
- disliked by people who will claim that I have betrayed them because we are supposed to be on the same team

It. Is. Incredibly. Difficult.
Holy heck.

But ultimately it helps me find my way back to myself, trust in my own assessment and confidence.
So... if you’ve felt like my politics and the expression of my politics has changed - this is why.

Anyways. Just some thoughts today. I value all of you and the discourse you bring to my life.