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I’ve been getting calls from friends and family who have questions about advance care planning. First, awesome! All adults should do this! Here are some things specific to the COVID era:
Advance directives are built for how we used to die, way back like 3 months ago – cancer, stroke, car accident. Questions about CPR or ventilators are about whether you want to try staying alive for just a little longer, usually.
They assume you are close to dying or that life will be very different at best if you survive – severe impairment, coma, that sort of thing. (Leaving how we value disability aside for now.)
These are important and everyone should think about and answer these questions. But COVID feels different, right? You might get really sick. You might need a ventilator (if one is available). But if you respond well and stabilize, you’ll probably get better.
My uncle asked what life is like after serious COVID and honestly as a species we just don’t know yet.
So some people would always want every last day they can get, whether it’s cancer or COVID. Others would not want to drag out a terminal illness but would like a fighting chance with this virus. Others are ready to forgo heavy treatment in any case. All are fine choices.
So what do you do?
1)Get specific. Most advance directives have space where you can write exceptions or more detail. Say what you want for a situation like COVID.
1)Get specific. Most advance directives have space where you can write exceptions or more detail. Say what you want for a situation like COVID.
2)Tell someone. This is arguably more important, for several reasons. Your hospital probably doesn’t have your advance directive on file and you’ll probably forget it in an emergency. End of life decisions also are usually a lot more nuanced than the forms lead you to believe.
Your proxy, or decision maker, needs to know your wishes and intent so they can advocate for you. Also, it’s a huge relief to family and friends if they know they made the right call and honored those wishes.
There are separate forms in many states, or separate sections of advance directives, that let you name a health care proxy. If you do nothing else, do that. And then talk to that person about what you would want in COVID and in more conventional situations.
If you don’t have a close family member, it’s fine to ask a friend or neighbor if they’d be your proxy. Make it a buddy system.
Getting started? https://prepareforyourcare.org/advance-directive">https://prepareforyourcare.org/advance-d... has easy forms for every state. https://theconversationproject.org/ ">https://theconversationproject.org/">... has kits to help you talk about end of life wishes.
