Domestic violence calls rise up to 60% in Lebanon. Cases increase 5 folds in Tunisia. France funds hotel rooms for abuse victims because of the soaring numbers. Women are trapped with their abusers. Many men do this in the name of Islam having “urged” for the beating of women.

No matter your stance on Islam, I think it’s important to battle this even if using quraan texts backed with some knowledge in Arabic. In case you ever have to deal with a man who thinks islam gives him the right to beat a woman up, I hope this thread helps you counter that.

Starting with the verse itself
“وَاللَّاتِي تَخَافُونَ نُشُوزَهُنَّ فَعِظُوهُنَّ وَاهْجُرُوهُنَّ فِي الْمَضَاجِعِ وَاضْرِبُوهُنَّ ۖ“

it’s very easy to consider the word ضرب here to mean beating up. But in reality the root of the word in arabic means something else that has also been used in multiple other verses that had nothing to do with the meaning of اللطم.

Originally in arabic and in it’s uses in the quraan,
الضرب بصورته المطلقه تعني الابتعاد والمفارقه
And I will list some instances it occured in the quraan meaning just that.

For starters keep in mind that

1)المعنى المطلق "ضرب": ابتعاد او ابعاد

2)ضرب في:ابتعاد مقترن بالسفر

3)ضرب على:اقتراب والتصاق (عكس الابتعاد)

4)ضرب ب:ابعاد شئ بأستخدام اداة

1)
يَضْرِبُ اللَّهُ الْحَقَّ وَالْبَاطِلَ
Here the word means putting a distance between what is right
wrong &
فَاضْرِبُوا فَوْقَ الْأَعْنَاقِ وَاضْرِبُوا مِنْهُمْ كُلَّ بَنَانٍ
This means to separate the head or the limbs from the body
Awful, yes but still means separation

2)الضرب في (مقترن بالسفر):

"لِلْفُقَرَاءِ الَّذِينَ أُحْصِرُوا فِي سَبِيلِ اللَّهِ لَا يَسْتَطِيعُونَ ضَرْبًا فِي الْأَرْضِ"

"يَا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا إِذَا ضَرَبْتُمْ فِي سَبِيلِ اللَّه"
In this case it is mentioned meaning travelling or roaming the earth

3)الضرب على(العكس، الصاق او اقتراب)
"وَضُرِبَتْ عَلَيْهِمُ الذِّلَّةُ وَالْمَسْكَنَةُ"
"وَلْيَضْرِبْنَ بِخُمُرِهِنَّ عَلَىٰ جُيُوبِهِنَّ"
In this case it means the opposite which is to attach something onto another

4)الضرب ب: ابعاد شيئين من خلال اداة
"فَضُرِبَ بَيْنَهُمْ بِسُورٍ"
"اضْرِبْ بِعَصَاكَ الْبَحْرَ"
Here it is mentioned meaning separating two things (the sea in second example) using a tool to do it

let’s talk about
ضرب الأمثال:
“كَمَثَلِ الَّذِينَ مِنْ قَبْلِهِمْ.."
“مَثَلُ الَّذِينَ يُنْفِقُونَ أَمْوَالَهُمْ فِي سَبِيلِ اللَّهِ كَمَثَلِ حَبَّةٍ أَنْبَتَتْ سَبْعَ سَنَابِلَ..”
No mention of the word
“ضرب”
when comparing similarities

“وَضَرَبَ اللَّهُ مَثَلًا رَجُلَيْنِ أَحَدُهُمَا أَبْكَمُ لَا يَقْدِرُ عَلَىٰ شَيْءٍ..هَلْ يَسْتَوِي هُوَ وَمَنْ يَأْمُرُ بِالْعَدْلِ .."
"وَضَرَبَ اللَّهُ مَثَلًا قَرْيَةً كَانَتْ آمِنَةً مُطْمَئِنَّةً.. فَأَذَاقَهَا اللَّهُ لِبَاسَ الْجُوعِ وَالْخَوْفِ"

The mention of ضرب above is in a comparison that states differences in two situations from each other, not to list similarities hence furthering the two situations.

“وَاللَّاتِي تَخَافُونَ نُشُوزَهُنَّ فَعِظُوهُنَّ وَاهْجُرُوهُنَّ فِي الْمَضَاجِعِ وَاضْرِبُوهُنَّ ۖ“
It’s easier to see now that it means furthering yourself from the women. NOT BEATING THEM. Most islamic scholars urge beating women merely because it serves them

Again, regardless of my own stance on islam, I’m personally agnostic, but this has helped me personally shut abusers up better than shitting on their religion has. Get to know more about their tool than they know & use it against them.