1/ I turned 39 today. I have a phenomenal family. A super successful and supportive wife @evelina8 whose accomplishments keep Californians safe and living their lives on the daily and who lets me pursue my artistic passion project... micro VC.

2/ I have the world's best daughter who is a perfect blend of precocious, smart and sweet. She is a combination of the protagonist of any popular romcom from the last 20 years and a Marvel Super-heroine. What more could a dad ask for?

3/ I founded and run my own venture firm where I get to make my own schedule (work 24/7) and get to meet and interact with the smartest people on the planet who are building the things I geek out on. I wouldn't trade our portfolio investments with those of any similar firm.

4/ I get to work with @HowieDelicious, Kari Sulenes ( @AtlasQ_) and @lisa_sulenes every day. Its hard to imagine a more varied group of people. It can be hard to sync up sometimes but when the stars align, it's magic.

5/ I led an @nvca webinar last week for the leadership in my industry with my parter Kari on how to run a firm and advise founders during the Covid-19 crisis with a focus on the human side of the equation.

6/ The therapy/coaching/health and wellness platform we created for Alpha Bridge Ventures and then spun out was featured in TechCrunch last week, its working with a bunch of top tier funds and has more work than we can handle. A success by any measure.

7/ I was quoted in the New York Times today about a unique program that we're rolling out at Alpha Bridge to support our founders during the Covid-19 crisis.

AND

I own a house (have a mortgage) in the SF Bay Area

8/ 20 year old me would be thrilled. I have exceeded most of the reasonable and unreasonable expectations of young me BUT BUT BUT

Despite everything I just said, despite a wonderful life, every single day I feel like I am losing the race.

9/ I am not good enough. I haven't raised enough money for our firm to be on solid footing, we haven't returned enough capital to our LPs, we haven't catalyzed enough impact in the world, I don't have enough twitter followers, there aren't enough VCs who want to share deals w/ me

10/ there aren't enough founders who know about us and want to work with us, we don't provide enough support to our portfolio founders and their companies, I don't spend enough time with my family... I am not enough.

11/ No matter how far I go, the goal posts go just a little further.

I can step outside to see these things but it doesn't change how inadequate I feel OR how jealous I am of other's success even though I hate being jealous.

Fin/

This is me at 39. Maybe if I raise the next fund I'll feel ok about myself.