Disney Magic Happens Now! https://twitter.com/spacefunkyarp/status/1245200902044160000

1) I am proud to announce Disney Parks has acquired the license for Azumanga Daioh! Expect to see a crazy tram tour with all your favorite girls including Yukari and Tomo at Disney California Adventure and Hollywood Studios within the next few years!

Yes Azumanga fans Yukari will be driving so you can expect some wild airtime. It will be replacing Star Wars Launch Bay in Florida and uh *shoots dart at wheel with blindfold on* Monster's Inc in California

2) Aerosmith told me to get coughed on so I am pleased to announce we are adding a dark ride section to Rock n Roller Coaster but also we are retheming the whole thing to Junji Ito. Do not bring your kid onto it and complain it's scary I will not care when I start running the NBA

As a part of the Junji Ito initiative, there will now be premium holes in the Disney Parks for easy transit between lands. Get your hole made just for you - for an additional $5000 fee. But watch out

3) Chapek is in cryogenic freezing right now actually. As a result I am adding something cool to Epcot. Test Track will now be about a meathead 80s anime girl teaching a 9ft cavegirl built like a brickhouse with large tits the history of motion like in 1982 & they kiss at the end

4) I am contemplating renaming Disneyland to Cum on Yourself Land as a tie-in to the Azumanga Daioh ride. It's only natural