I’d like to make an official statement on Twitter that I am watching Gossip Girl for the first time, thank you.

I cannot believe Serena’s deal to start is “took her best friend’s boyfriend’s virginity and didn’t even apologize,” Dan Humphrey is a shallow motherfucker

Also weird to watch this as an adult fan of You and Single Parents. Mostly consumed with how stressful it would be to have a teen daughter who looks like Blake Lively!

Realizing I WILL be tweeting this after all.

I had weird deja vu for ONLY the Eric Van Der Woodsen scenes and finally realized I know him from Revenge, where he plays the same character but poor

How could anyone root against Balir Waldorf, a teen girl who serves a sleepover party martini with gin “as it should be.”

I’m not sure I can go back to bars after quarantine because according to this show they are all filled with literal children

Gossip Girl is more real to me than the recent past now

In Episode 6, Serena accepts a date to a masked ball from a stranger with the screen name richboyIV

Immediately after this Gossip Girl writes a post subtweeting Dan Humphrey for being a coward which based on what I do know is... unhinged

I’m in the second season now and I have to say that whenever they talk it feels like Vanessa and Rufus are going to bone. Weird vibe to have with your childhood friend’s dad!

In this episode New York magazine asks Dan to do a journalism because of a short story he wrote; he remains in high school!!!

In the course of Dan’s reporting, Bart Bass spontaneously confesses to being responsible for a man’s death because a random teenager his son doesn’t like very much mentions a fire

Dan and Serena discovered they DID share a brother, but he’s dead, so they’re fine. This conception of what is and is not a problem is suspect and not entirely sound!

Serena Van Der Woodsen getting into Yale — over Blair who has all As and maybe even more money — largely because of her time in Page Six seems both insane and staggeringly realistic.

There is nothing more endearing to me than a female character (Blair, duh) who begins but then, with steely resolve, refuses to cry.

Blair getting her minions to play devil and angel for her as she tries to make a decision is honestly a friendship dynamic I want.

Gossip Girl loves a question that doesn’t really make sense to ask — Chuck Bass just very seriously and dramatically asked when the door to a women’s bathroom was locked. Well, dude!