True love needs very little rules or enforcement.

When you truly love, you always seek what’s best for the object of your love.

That creates a relationship environment that doesn’t need a lot of rules because both parties actively seek what is best for the other.

Also, when you truly love, you actively seek to prevent actions that are harmful to the object of your love.

Example: someone attractive flirts with you. True Love in you immediately rejects such flirtation without the influence of your s/o (telling you to reject such).

This is why Jesus said, “if you love me you WILL keep my commandments.”

Jesus understands that if your love for Him is true, then your lifestyle will be such that is pleasing to Him.

The true love must come first else His commandments will seem grievous!

God doesn’t want behavior modification. He wants true love from us. He wants to love Him as He FIRST loved us! Always looking out for what’s best for us and always working to bring it to pass for us!

God understands that unless we truly come to love Him, all His “rules” will be a burden to us and we will not follow Him with pure motives, but rather to avoid the punishment that comes with breaking the rules.

God then grants us grace, to be born again, and become like Jesus, BEFORE we decide to adhere to His rules.
Why?
Because God knows that without His help (grace) we wouldn’t ever seek to love Him. We would stay rebellious and stiffnecked.

So by grace are we saved thru faith AND THAT FAITH IS NOT BORN OF OURSELVES but rather it is the gift of God!