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tw suicide, COVID-19
Hey, so, um, there's a big elephant in the room right now. COVID isn't the only epidemic happening right now - and it's come at a bad, bad time. Not that there's ever a good time.
There's a mental health epidemic happening, and we're gonna start seeing-
Hey, so, um, there's a big elephant in the room right now. COVID isn't the only epidemic happening right now - and it's come at a bad, bad time. Not that there's ever a good time.
There's a mental health epidemic happening, and we're gonna start seeing-
tw suicide, COVID-19
-more deaths from that soon. Certainly at least attempts. Between layoffs, homelessness and social isolation, this is basically a perfect storm of Suicide Triggers.
Please, please, PLEASE check on your friends. And I don't mean sending them 'hey'
-more deaths from that soon. Certainly at least attempts. Between layoffs, homelessness and social isolation, this is basically a perfect storm of Suicide Triggers.
Please, please, PLEASE check on your friends. And I don't mean sending them 'hey'
tw suicide, COVID-19
I mean, ask if they are safe. I mean, ask if they have somewhere to live right now. I mean, ask if they are keeping up with their meds. I mean, even if they say they're fine, make sure they know there is a safe place somewhere.
I mean, ask if they are safe. I mean, ask if they have somewhere to live right now. I mean, ask if they are keeping up with their meds. I mean, even if they say they're fine, make sure they know there is a safe place somewhere.
tw suicide, COVID-19
When we can't afford our meds, bad things happen. Chronic pain patients, schizophrenic folks, borderline and narcissistic people, epileptic people.
And when we can't tell the anxiety or paranoia that it's wrong?
That's even worse.
When we can't afford our meds, bad things happen. Chronic pain patients, schizophrenic folks, borderline and narcissistic people, epileptic people.
And when we can't tell the anxiety or paranoia that it's wrong?
That's even worse.
tw suicide, COVID-19
The hospitals are also incredibly overworked right now, which means attempts are.... much more likely to go Incredibly Badly.
So catching things early is SO, SO MUCH MORE IMPORTANT rn.
The hospitals are also incredibly overworked right now, which means attempts are.... much more likely to go Incredibly Badly.
So catching things early is SO, SO MUCH MORE IMPORTANT rn.
tw suicide, COVID-19
That in mind, here's a few tips for people who want to help but aren't.... sure what to do.
1. When somebody's suicidal, it is NOT about you. Guilt doesn't work. It makes us feel worse. Which makes us more suicidal. Guilt after the fact is also super shitty
That in mind, here's a few tips for people who want to help but aren't.... sure what to do.
1. When somebody's suicidal, it is NOT about you. Guilt doesn't work. It makes us feel worse. Which makes us more suicidal. Guilt after the fact is also super shitty
tw suicide, COVID-19
1 cont. I've had people get mad at me for not checking in with *them* after *my* suicide attempts. Don't be this person. Your friend's brain is kind of busy. Go process your feelings with somebody in a better place.
1 cont. I've had people get mad at me for not checking in with *them* after *my* suicide attempts. Don't be this person. Your friend's brain is kind of busy. Go process your feelings with somebody in a better place.
tw suicide, COVID-19
2. Don't call the cops, especially right now. 911 calls are what a lot of people suggest, but the only time you should ever do that is when you know somebody's already taken meds and/or hurt themselves - bc then you get an ambulance.
2. Don't call the cops, especially right now. 911 calls are what a lot of people suggest, but the only time you should ever do that is when you know somebody's already taken meds and/or hurt themselves - bc then you get an ambulance.
tw suicide, COVID-19
2 cont. Friends have called ambulances on me before and saved my life because I'd already overdosed. I've *also* had cops called on me who brutalized me when I was mid-psychosis. Avoid unless there's a physical medical emergency.
2 cont. Friends have called ambulances on me before and saved my life because I'd already overdosed. I've *also* had cops called on me who brutalized me when I was mid-psychosis. Avoid unless there's a physical medical emergency.
tw suicide, COVID-19
3. "It gets better" works sometimes, but don't have that be your go-to - especially since, well, things have sucked for a lot of us for a long time. Talk to us about what's good now. Seriously, it can be the freakin' Nebula slate if you want.
3. "It gets better" works sometimes, but don't have that be your go-to - especially since, well, things have sucked for a lot of us for a long time. Talk to us about what's good now. Seriously, it can be the freakin' Nebula slate if you want.
tw suicide, COVID-19
4. The better you know your friend, the easier it'll be, but in general: BPD suicidality, PTSD suicidality, depressed suicidality, etc. behave differently. If your friend has BPD and bounces back really quickly, they weren't faking it! BPD is genuinely-
4. The better you know your friend, the easier it'll be, but in general: BPD suicidality, PTSD suicidality, depressed suicidality, etc. behave differently. If your friend has BPD and bounces back really quickly, they weren't faking it! BPD is genuinely-
tw suicide, COVID-19
4 cont. -like that. PTSD suicidality is a little more long-term but can be a background thing responsive to triggers, whereas depressed suicidality is not gonna go away overnight. (Usually. Rule of thumb.)
4 cont. -like that. PTSD suicidality is a little more long-term but can be a background thing responsive to triggers, whereas depressed suicidality is not gonna go away overnight. (Usually. Rule of thumb.)
tw suicide, COVID-19
The main thing is that different forms of suicidality are all still.... real. There's a horrible chronic thing online of accusing people of faking it for attention because "oh my boyfriend did that to keep me with him once" and listen, i'm not saying that-
The main thing is that different forms of suicidality are all still.... real. There's a horrible chronic thing online of accusing people of faking it for attention because "oh my boyfriend did that to keep me with him once" and listen, i'm not saying that-
tw suicide, COVID-19
-it doesn't happen, but you need to be a little less quick to assume that somebody not behaving the way you "think" they should be is being dishonest about it.
-it doesn't happen, but you need to be a little less quick to assume that somebody not behaving the way you "think" they should be is being dishonest about it.
tw suicide, COVID-19
5. Herding friends out of public vent channels and stuff is a good thing, for a lot of reasons. It keeps others feeling safer, avoids suicidal chain reactions, and your friend will feel a lot more comfortable after the fact, usually.
5. Herding friends out of public vent channels and stuff is a good thing, for a lot of reasons. It keeps others feeling safer, avoids suicidal chain reactions, and your friend will feel a lot more comfortable after the fact, usually.
tw suicide, COVID-19
5 cont. But you have to do it CAREFULLY. And you have to be willing to follow through and actually talk to them in DMs. If not, let them use the vent channel and get the mod to scrub it in the morning.
5 cont. But you have to do it CAREFULLY. And you have to be willing to follow through and actually talk to them in DMs. If not, let them use the vent channel and get the mod to scrub it in the morning.
tw suicide, COVID-19, self-harm
6. Harm reduction. This sucks to hear, because obviously we don't want our friends hurting ourselves at all. But a friend with cuts on their arm or drinking too much is *better than a dead friend.* Don't guilt somebody for what they're doing to-
6. Harm reduction. This sucks to hear, because obviously we don't want our friends hurting ourselves at all. But a friend with cuts on their arm or drinking too much is *better than a dead friend.* Don't guilt somebody for what they're doing to-
tw suicide, COVID-19, self-harm
6 cont. *avoid* suicide, or to cope with their emotions when they don't have access to other stuff. Of course it's not ideal! Of course it's not great! And of course I have fucked this up in the past. You don't have to be happy about it.
6 cont. *avoid* suicide, or to cope with their emotions when they don't have access to other stuff. Of course it's not ideal! Of course it's not great! And of course I have fucked this up in the past. You don't have to be happy about it.
tw suicide, COVID-19, self-harm
6 cont. And you don't have to be okay with hearing about it, but people develop bad coping mechanisms for a *reason*. And if you're able to do it without endangering yourself, being somebody they can talk to about, like, "hey i drank too much" or-
6 cont. And you don't have to be okay with hearing about it, but people develop bad coping mechanisms for a *reason*. And if you're able to do it without endangering yourself, being somebody they can talk to about, like, "hey i drank too much" or-
tw suicide, COVID-19, self-harm
6 cont. "hey i relapsed" or whatnot, is a really valuable thing. Again, self-harming friend is an Alive Friend. They can't heal if they're dead. I know that sounds really harsh and it's hard to process, but it.... is what it is.
6 cont. "hey i relapsed" or whatnot, is a really valuable thing. Again, self-harming friend is an Alive Friend. They can't heal if they're dead. I know that sounds really harsh and it's hard to process, but it.... is what it is.
tw suicide, COVID-19, self-harm
AGAIN THOUGH, your boundaries and comfort matter! "I can't help you with self-harm stuff" is not the same thing as "cutting is weak and harmful and you shouldn't do it". And I've connected friends who could help each other with things I couldn't.
AGAIN THOUGH, your boundaries and comfort matter! "I can't help you with self-harm stuff" is not the same thing as "cutting is weak and harmful and you shouldn't do it". And I've connected friends who could help each other with things I couldn't.
tw suicide, COVID-19
Finally -
You are not going to be perfect at this. You aren't a mental health professional. And no, you're not always going to have the option to tell your friends to go to a therapist, but the important part is that you are going to fuck up.
Finally -
You are not going to be perfect at this. You aren't a mental health professional. And no, you're not always going to have the option to tell your friends to go to a therapist, but the important part is that you are going to fuck up.
tw suicide, COVID-19
You are going to say the wrong thing. You are going to have to apologize. You are going to have to say to your friends, "I don't know what I'm doing and I don't know how to help you, but I'm listening".
And that's okay.
You are going to say the wrong thing. You are going to have to apologize. You are going to have to say to your friends, "I don't know what I'm doing and I don't know how to help you, but I'm listening".
And that's okay.
tw suicide, COVID-19
And to my friends and fam and community struggling with suicidal thoughts:
I get you. I'm with you. Live out of spite if you have to, or curiosity, or inertia. No reason is a wrong reason. You don't need permission.
We got this.
And to my friends and fam and community struggling with suicidal thoughts:
I get you. I'm with you. Live out of spite if you have to, or curiosity, or inertia. No reason is a wrong reason. You don't need permission.
We got this.
this is.... clearly resonating with people so I'm gonna attach two things:
one, I write about PTSD and harm reduction in my ongoing serial Ghosts in Quicksilver - Book 1 is downloadable here: https://payhip.com/b/pD5f (it's free!)
one, I write about PTSD and harm reduction in my ongoing serial Ghosts in Quicksilver - Book 1 is downloadable here: https://payhip.com/b/pD5f (it's free!)
two, if you can't get to a therapist right now, one of the things you can do is read through a DBT workbook! http://connectdurham.altervista.org/CD/documents/BPDWorkbook.pdf this is a downloadable PDF with a lot of chapters on distress tolerance, which i think we could all do w/ some help on <3
I never would have dreamed of getting several HUNDRED downloads on my book, so here's some other indie authors to support! @/EnnisRBashe writes queer and disabled games, zines, books and poetry here: https://ennisrook.itch.io/ incl. the short story collection Soulmates and Starlight
-games like 'self-care for wizards' and a poetry book with the hilarious title 'LAST TIME JOEY HOSTED A PARTY, EIGHT PEOPLE DIED'.
@/emrowene writes a gothic fantasy enemies-to-lovers serial called FRACTURED MAGIC that updates here: https://emrowene.com/ It's currently on hiatus, but Book One is done!
@/ahn_writing writes kinky lesbian mysteries about Harrietta Lee, Disaster Mage, and has two books in the series out! https://twitter.com/ahn_writing/status/1157160239096971265?s=19 Stephanie also writes short stories, notably the incredible Skin Job (read the tws!) https://www.google.com/amp/s/stephanie-ahn-books.com/2019/05/25/skin-job-short-story/amp/
@/PeriAkman1 writes the dark fantasy Sigil Series ( https://www.amazon.com/Warlocks-Sigil-Book-1-ebook/dp/B073MR9TR2/) as well as a gaslamp fantasy webserial called Grimoire's Soul! https://periakman.wordpress.com/grimoires-soul/ Grimoire's Soul updates on Tuesdays and is ongoing c:
@/BabyVampAmi writes incredible poetry about abuse, trauma, queerness, morality and philosophy - the link of all her work is here https://twitter.com/BabyVampAmi/status/1117859138959069184?s=20 My personal fave is DEVOLUTION, a response to Dante's Divine Comedy, and she has four books out so far.
@/briseisbooks is a poet with SIX whole books out now! Shelby writes lovely soft emotional work about identity, family, fat acceptance, self-love, aromanticism and asexuality! I super love GODDESS OF THE HUNT which is about the goddess Artemis :D https://linktr.ee/briseisbooks
@/theblackbuffy is an experimental poet who has a BUNCH of chapbooks and assorted published poems, most recently THE CHOSEN ONE - a Buffy-themed chapbook about black womanhood. All of Vanessa's books are listed here: https://vanessamaki.webnode.com/books/
(I particularly enjoyed 'press ctrl-alt-delete' and the way it used digital/computer visuals!)
