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it was tomorrow. until it was yesterday. you look to your right. has that always been there? the television running faintly in the background implores you to buy a new couch. you could use one, but what couldn’t you use? a hairbrush, if you decide to shave your head tonight.
you fear judgment. what don’t you fear? was that merely yesterday’s fear? who you are today is not who you were when you went to sleep. the truth is, that thing had not always been there. you hadn’t even seen it before. now it is to your right. better to be right than left.
but again, what is space and the referential terminology we use to classify it? whose eyes are you using to determine what is situated where? you can’t be sure that your sight is your own. a visual work, vividly projected through our mind’s collective conscience to our eyes.
maybe this is what they mean when they say “third eye awakening.” you’ve always dismissed the spiritual world. but with that thing sitting to your right, it’s hard to deny its presence. like god in the chili’s, there are three eyes in the body.
you have to view a body as The Body, once reaching enlightenment. at least, that’s what they said to me when i got here. a woven tapestry of energetic fields, collecting us like magnets to its core. something like that. The Body, it’s all one, and we are all an equal part.
the question of whose body we are in is beside the question. we are here to search for the core of our collective. not to expound upon the spirituality we’ve already adopted, but to reach the end of our cycle. cyclical, like a butterfly returning to chrysalis.
a cycle can be defined as the period it takes to accept your place in the cosmos. for some, it begins the very moment of conception. for others, it can take a whole human lifespan. if longer, you will reincarnate until you reach a place of certainty regarding the Core.
a human lifespan can be seen as different from a lifespan in general, depending on how you choose to view your role in the energetic tapestry. do you choose to see yourself as existing now, therefore existing forever? or existing in this state, to become a different form after?
so as not to exclude nihilism, you might believe that we exist now and never again. such thinking would likely lead you to another body after your current one expires. it is your choice, as ultimately, all of this is. it is all completely in and out of your hands, with a choice.
consider adding a purpose to your existence. consider the fact that you made that purpose yourself. all things considered, your thoughts may feel altogether powerful and wrought with frivolities. accept that this is always the case, in any capacity of existence.
the question is not as plain as why do we think at all. or why do we exist at all. the question is: if there is no point to questioning at all, which question do you choose to form your reality? and choosing no question is just as much of a choice.
perhaps the most exciting part? you cannot decide wrong. but if you foresee your choice changing after you’ve left your current body, would you still choose something you’re expecting to alter? there is something in your awareness preparing you for otherness, no?
this otherness is feared by so many. things shift. there is something sitting to your right, remember. things move around without your attention. being that correct answers can change, just as everything else, what then, is the purpose to finding the correct answer?
you choosing that there is a value in correctness? by doing so, you’re placing your reasoning on a pedastal. pedestals by nature are above your earthly comrades, inherently denying that there is a collectivity in this universe at all. you’re not selfish, you’re insecure.
whatever value you choose to place upon being correct is not the same as the value of being true. being correct is not necessarily being true, as your truth differs from everyone else’s, by the nature of your choices.
you can ask yourself, what is it we are all eternally searching for? and the correct answer does not exist, but a true one might, depending on the frankness involved. even then, one true answer is only one true answer, and there begs to be a whole world of different ones.
finding your purpose in trueness provides validity for many. virtuous people seem to search for their truth, while the unvirtuous seem to live by theirs. is there a difference, between searching and living?
as you venture deeper into the collective consciousness and feel all these thoughts, so saturated by meaning and brimming with oblivion, you can’t tell if your chest expands or restricts. it can do both but it has become an operational point for all awareness.
deep breathing helps the environment more than it helps you, perhaps. after all the environment has done for you, throw it a bone. you’ve got plenty of those. you need most, but not all. in the same regard, you need some solutions, not the answers.
what you’re experiencing cannot be restricted by language or physical expression. your mind’s unique ability to reason and unreason comes with the responsibility of choice.
you may choose wisely, or you may not choose at all. closing your eyes is opening them, just as opening them is closing off your personal hyperreality. after all, it was yesterday until it was tomorrow.
