I was at an event in a beautiful public gardens place up in the country the other day helping an lgbt-centric band play a gig, with the Melbourne Gay and Lesbian Chorus playing between our two sets
The members and the crowd were like 90% queer folk, young and old, trans and
nonbinary and GNC, families bringing their kids along and supportive friends and family alike
I was happily presenting fem and even tho my hair and eyeliner were kinda messy I felt pretty and I felt happy and it was a damn good day
Someone's tiny daughter came up to me and asked
My name and I said "hello I'm Alex what's your name" and she said "amelia" and I said "oh thats a lovely name! I have another friend named Amelia who lives in england" and then Amelia spelled out her name for me and then ran and hid behind her mum's legs and it was the cutest
sweetest thing ever
The gardens were beautiful and the whole day was beautiful and I was surrounded by all kinds of queer people from all walks of life and for the first time ever i truly felt a sense of "community", as if the word was meaningless to me until now
There was such
an aura of positive energy it kinda threw my usual online interactions into stark contrast and I realised so much of Online™ is just sheer hostility that means absolutely nothing in offline social situations
I don't want to discount anyone's relationships to their identities
because lord knows i feel stronger than ever after discovering mine, it's often the only real form of belonging many of us get the chance to experience. meeting others online who share your labels and knowing you're not alone is an incredible and powerful thing that those of us
just a few generations before never had, and we're incredibly lucky (and dare I say privileged) to have it.
But thats why it depresses me so much when all we ever seem to do online is tear each other down arguing over who's more oppressed and who is "allowed" what label
As if we
actually consider it more important to spread negativity than positivity
I don't want this all to be read as just a roundabout way of saying "shut up and go outside lol" because again, there are millions of us who don't have that opportunity.
But i know millions of us can, too
If you don't already and if you have the means available to you, I strongly encourage you to try getting involved in more local lgbt events. Anything and everything at all, don't just stop at the pride march. Invite all the queers in town to a nice picnic in the gardens on a nice
day. Start a band or a theatre group or anything artsy you like. Find and mingle with the queer folks in your area and just, chill. No need for big discussions or debates, just hang out and play board games. Feel that positive vibe, that sense of belonging.
Again, I'm not saying
"put your phone away and go outside and see what it's like in the REEEAL WOOORLD" but also I... Kinda am? Not to say that Online is a wholly negative and harmful place to be, but if we can take those good vibes of being in a safe, nonjudgmental environment free of prejudice and
free of intracommunity scrutiny and demands to follow arbitrary "rules" like dogma, and bring those vibes back to our online spaces we can make it a much better, happier place for everyone to be. Focus on loving and uplifting one another instead of pushing them down
Slightly tangential but it's kinda like when you leave high school and realise all of it was meaningless
"Wow none of that shit mattered at all, all it did was stress me the hell out and now I have depression"
We can and SHOULD make our spaces so much safer and happier and friendlier than they are, and I think the first step towards that is to really look at your own mindset and the beliefs you've developed and question whether it's really necessary in the long run
We can Marie kondo the fuck out of queer twitter
Does attacking your fellow oppressed folks spark joy
Bump
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