Thinking of telling my family about this whole situation is making me CRY. If I tell them I hooked up and I was lied to, I'm a degenerate -- but if I tell them about the possible HIV exposure and the pills, I start a fucking crisis.

I just want to fucking disappear and not have to think about this mess!!

My pharmacist's reactions haven't been helping. She's this sweet lady that I've known for over a decade, and when I told her about why I needed PEP, her jaw dropped and she got a poker face. The next day, she made a simple error and forgot to order Isentress...

...(which is one of the parts of PEP). I wasn't perturbed by it because I knew the prescription could be transferred, but she said to me "I feel like I'm killing you. I'm so sorry".

My family, the pharmacist, and the very real threat of me contracting an immune-damaging virus IS A LITTLE TOO MUCH FOR MY MENTAL HEALTH

Not to mention the original doctor I saw was such a BITCH. She rudely asked me "do you even know what [PEP] is?", "where did you find out about [PEP]?" -- I just shocked. I told her I didn't want bloodwork until I got her opinion on whether I needed the pills or not...

...and she comes back a few minutes later and prescribed me the pills and said I was free to go! I was appalled at the simple lack of basic fucking compassion and understanding of her profession. Oh well, never seeing her again.