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storytime about the first time I j*** off and watched p*rn
a thread:
a thread:
so I went to a private Christian middle school in 7th grade and I didn’t know anything about j*** off. one day, in the bathroom, Ezequiel, who was in my class but was 3 years older bc he failed twice, asked me if I ever t0uched myself and I said wdym?
and then he was like “if you t0uch your th1ngy it’ll get bigger and then you can make c*m come out” and I was like “bR0 do you mean P€€” KSJDKSJXKDJ and he was like NO I MEAN C*M and then he was gonna explain further but the janitor walked in and told us to get to class
anyways, when we were walking to class, he told me if I did it right it would sm£ll like shr1mp so I was like WELL I LIKE SHRIMP SO MAYBE I WIN YUP. so I went home on my Minecraft computer and searched up what j***ing off was
I was reading “how to m@$turb@t€” articles online and decided to give it a try. so then I did it BUT I had an org*sm but nothing came out bc I don’t think my b@ll$ produced sp*rm at the time 
so I was like ok nothing came out and nothing smelled like shr1mp
so I was like ok nothing came out and nothing smelled like shr1mp
SO SOMEONE WAS LYING TO ME chileee but then I think I forgot that org*sm feels good bc I never tried to j*** off again. then one day, I was sitting on my bed and all of a sudden when i was doing science hw my d*** got h@rd and I was like HEY LIL BUDDY
this was around 7 months after the first dr¥ c*m incident and so I started str0k1ng my d*** and like 5 minutes later I c4me but this time something came out and I wasn’t expecting it and c*m stains got all over my clothes and science notebook
I was so confused bc I was like DID I JUST P€€ ALL OVER MY SCIENCE NOTEBOOK WTF and I was so scared so I cleaned everything off and then just ignored it. so then the next night, I I searched up videos of p*rn bc I wanted to know what was supposed to happen
then I saw the guy c*m and the girl making him c*m and I was like WAYAMENT maybe this is more fun than Minecraft lets plays, so I realized you’re supposed to c*m and in the meantime I got h0rn¥ and j*** off to a m1lf and st€ps0n p*rn0 which became my first ever p0rn vid the end
