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aragorn: you must call for aid. gondor will answer
theoden: idk calling a bunch of dudes for aid? sounds pretty sus
theoden: idk calling a bunch of dudes for aid? sounds pretty sus
helms deep gets vibe checked
denethor, directly into the camera: they say the white tree is gonna bloom when the king returns. i don't know if it works in reverse but just in case i piss on it every day
denethor holding the cracked horn: explain this
gandalf: in my defense i was also dead when it happened
gandalf: in my defense i was also dead when it happened
pippin: we've got the white wizard, that's got to count for something
gandalf: peregrin i'm worth about fifteen to eighteen dudes and that still won't be enough dudes
gandalf: peregrin i'm worth about fifteen to eighteen dudes and that still won't be enough dudes
denethor: sing me a song
pippin, sobbing: camptown ladies sing this song
pippin, sobbing: camptown ladies sing this song
faramir: you wish i died instead of boromir???
denethor sipping from dad of the year mug: yea
denethor sipping from dad of the year mug: yea
frodo: friendship with sam has ended. skelebones goblin is my best friend now
sam: let me cancel gollum frodo
frodo: no
sam: HE KEEPS FATSHAMING ME FRODO
frodo: I SAID NO
frodo: no
sam: HE KEEPS FATSHAMING ME FRODO
frodo: I SAID NO
aragorn in the paths of the dead: hey there demons. it's me, ya boi
gimli: (wincing as he steps through a bone pile)
legolas: gimli we've been killing like thirty people a day
legolas: gimli we've been killing like thirty people a day
gondorian infantryman 1: they keep saying "grond" down there. what the fuck is a grond
infantryman 2: pretty sure it's another word for taint
infantryman 2: pretty sure it's another word for taint
denethor: i'm no doctor but i'm pretty sure faramir is dead
denethor: (screaming, on fire)
gandalf: wellllllll my staff is broken soooooooooooooo
gandalf: wellllllll my staff is broken soooooooooooooo
gandalf: death is just another path
pippin: does anyone know how a pep talk works. please. i'm begging you
pippin: does anyone know how a pep talk works. please. i'm begging you
(fell beast approaching)
eowyn: deep breaths eowyn. a dragon is just a kind of horse
eowyn: deep breaths eowyn. a dragon is just a kind of horse
sam: if we're gonna pass as orcs we need to sound like orcs and if there's anything i've learned by now it's that orcs are mad racist. say a slur mr. frodo
frodo: what
sam: we're in disguise it's the only way
frodo: no
frodo: what
sam: we're in disguise it's the only way
frodo: no
sam: ah rosie cotton. if i was gonna marry anyone it would've been her
frodo: am i a joke to you
frodo: am i a joke to you
this thread happened bc i watched 12 hours of lord of the rings yesterday which made me more powerful than you can possibly imagine. lotr movies is good. gimli/legolas is the light & the way. arwen is prime wife. aragorn is hotter when he looks like he smells like shit
