Ok so after a lot of sitting on my hands, I'm finally dropping my meta about Dimitri, Borderline Personality Disorder, and how you can use BPD as a framework in making sense of his character in fanwork and general discussion. Full disclosure (drumroll) I also have BPD.

Before I begin, this is not to suggest that Dimitri is BPD representation within FE3H. He has a lot of similar symptoms to a person who has it, but he suffers from the violent tropes that plague a lot of uninformed portrayals of BPD or related symptoms/mental illnesses.

That said, I think Dimitri, specifically in Azure Moon, resonates with me as someone who has BPD. Also, I'm tired of seeing fandom going lol what the fuck is wrong with him when there are people like me with similar symptoms just sitting here.

So first things first, what is Borderline Personality Disorder? It's a mental illness that makes your emotional capacity operate in extremes. People with BPD struggle with gray areas, feel emotions larger than most, and are terrified of real or perceived abandonment.

It's also worth noting that BPD responses to triggers may come off weird to outside perspectives. Anything and everything can carry the same weight to us. In Dimitri's case, we see that even minor inconveniences like weak sewing skills can make him spiral.

Like most brain shit, there are theories as to how it develops. They range from environmental, genetic, or just brain development that went awry. Comorbidity with other mental illnesses is common, especially PTSD.

Outside of the definition, there are symptoms that may lead to a person being diagnosed. Not every person with BPD will have identical symptoms. For example, you can make a case for interpreting Sylvain as borderline. He does/would not experience identical symptoms as Dimitri.

So let's get into symptoms! A common one is distorted and unstable self image/sense of self. We see the self image piece present itself from the jump. Pre-timeskip Dimitri constantly frets about how people see him, while dependent on what your/Byleth's perception is of him.

His sense of self is also a touchy subject for him. There are moments where it falters, but I think the most important one is in Mercedes and his A-support, where he flounders when asked what his own dreams are. Who is he outside what Faerghus needs him to be? He doesn't know.

Dimitri, like many folks with BPD, also struggles with black and white thinking. This is particularly obvious in his vitriol toward Edelgard with his view of you/Byleth, even Ashe and Dedue, can be seem as the opposite end of the binary.

Relating to this, anger is frequently difficult to manage. Dimitri struggles with this emotion throughout any route, but it becomes particularly apparent in Azure Moon. His anger, though valid after his repeated trauma, maintains a level of intensity that is inappropriate.

Even with this explosive anger, people with BPD frequently feel empty. In all honesty, it's REALLY hard to describe unless you feel it yourself, but imagine you explode and then there's nothing left. I'm not sure if it's totally what Gilbert means, but it feels close.

Dimitri's approach to combat, particularly post-timeskip, can be read as three separate criterium for BPD. His strategy is impulsive. He suffers from suicidal ideation. While it's not traditional portrayals of self harm, his treatment of himself can certainly be read as such.

He also struggles with unreality, though admittedly the portrayal of his psychosis is weak and has been discussed in other threads. I will say that I appreciate that Dimitri admits that this is not a symptom that will be magic'ed away.

The game looks at Dimitri's immense amount of empathy and how it can be a hindrance as well as a gift. It's something that's important to remember when talking about BPD. Yes, it can be tough, but it can also be managed and used to your advantage.

The game is also strangely good at echoing what my therapist has been trying to drill into my head for months concerning "bad" emotions. Dimitri has to take accountability for his actions, but that doesn't mean he should never be angry or upset. He just needs to be mindful of it.

In all honesty, Dedue really nails what it means to have BPD in his walk around dialogue toward the end of Azure Moon. It's who you are. Your brain has developed in a way that you carry intense emotions and sometimes you can put on a brave face and sometimes you can't.

So the question becomes what can fandom do with this potential framework? I think being mindful of ableism concerning certain symptoms is a huge. Yes, we should critique Dimitri's violence esp as a mental illness narrative. But the feral jokes need to stop.

I also recommend doing some research about DBT, which is a form of therapy that was created by someone with BPD to help people with BPD. It's skills-based and helps you develop mindfulness to deal with the suffering that is being alive. It's a good detail for modern aus!

While I'm grateful for Dimitri as a character, I think there are weak points we can sure up with fanwork. So let him go to therapy! Let him learn some breathing exercises! Let him see red and use skills to get back to an okay level! I think there's a lot of potential there.

The last thought I really want to end on is that it is totally okay to still dunk on Dimitri. There's a LOT to dunk on him over. But please reflect on why you're doing it. If it's just to laugh at people who think differently from you, it might be a good idea to knock it off.

I think I will wrap it up here. I actually have a LOT more I can say, but Twitter is not a great place for long form work. Maybe I'll write a full length piece if there's interest. Thank you for reading and keep it cool in the replies, thanks.