Hello junior academic person. Are you about to write an email to a woman academic? Before you do so, please pause and read your email and ask yourself, “Would I be comfortable sending this email to a male academic whom I respect?” Because my inbox for the past months has been:

“I don’t have time to read through your work. Here is some information about my project. Can you tell me which is the best paper of yours to cite?”

“I am researching an area that is related to your expertise. Can you please email me all your publications?”

“My thesis is exactly on your expertise but I already have these prominent American/male/senior scholars on my advisory panel. Can you read my thesis and give me feedback for free?”

“We are organizing an event and have confirmed these white male mentors. We would like you to be our diversity card but we have maxed out our budget. Can you help us at your own expense?”

“Hey I saw someone tweeting your work and you seem cool. Have you been researching your research for long? I have been researching this research for my PhD. I am an expert. We should chat.”

“I am going to submit a journal article on your research expertise but I hope you won’t be my review because you are the expert in this area and will probably be harsh lol but any way can you read my draft and give me feedback before I submit lol emoji emoji lol”

“I saw that you have this successful project/grant and I want to be included. Can you add me in? No? Because you already have your named grant collaborators? Can’t you just add me in now? Aren’t you supposed to be mentoring junior scholars?”

“Hi I am researching your topic and want to pick your brain. Oh why do you want me to email you my specific questions? I don’t really have any. I just wanna chat. Can you give me your phone number or Skype? I really don’t have any fixed questions now. Maybe when we chat I will.”

“Can you read my thesis for free and give me feedback? I am from a prestigious university in the US and this will be very good for your CV.”

“I saw one of your talks on YouTube. I am rushing out a paper so can you send me your transcript and I will just quote you from there?”

All of these queries have been via just email alone, discounting the even more casual ones via social media. Every single one has been from a male postgraduate or junior scholar. Why do you talk like this? Do you know how you sound?

For the record, I do A LOT of mentoring, in person and online, consistently every month, especially for scholars in the Global South, those who feel marginalized, and those who ask nicely. It is not too difficult to learn email decorum and human courtesy. And not to be sexist.

I am going to drink bubble tea and eat cake in bed now. Goodnight.

Thank you all for the commiseration, however depressing. Be polite and kind. Don’t be sexist. Take care of one another. Please enjoy this Pusheen.