I really want to like @LoveYourGarden2, but the amount of ableism in the eps with disabled family members is staggering. They need a disabled editor / consultant *badly*, and they all need to watch Stella Young’s talk about inspiration porn:

Hold on, are ALL of these eps about families that have sick and disabled family members? Oh wow. You really, really need to hire a disability consultant for this show, @LoveYourGarden2.

Ep 1: “...transforming gardens across the country to say thank you to some very special people for the courage they’ve shown in the face of adversity.” (Show carer helping disabled person into a wheelchair, show parent washing a disabled child’s feet).

“This week we’re helping a fellow gardener and his family as they bravely cope with a life-threatening disease.”

Emphasise how happy & normal family were, then cue sad piano music as they tell the story of his diagnosis. It’s okay to feel sad about a diagnosis, but...

...to so clearly and heavy handedly make this person’s current life seem like a tragedy is an ableist stereotype.

Abled people love this narrative.

Lots of before photos, showing him abled, with sad piano music.

“It’s left him confined to a wheelchair and able to communicate only via an iBoard.” *sad music still playing*

Stop using “confined” and “bound” re wheelchairs! Wheelchairs are freedom. Also, he can communicate!

And yet we hear so little from this person who can communicate! And we hear so much from his family instead. The host barely talks to him.

A family member tearfully says, “The worst part about this disease is that it doesn’t affect the brain at all. Mentally he’s still there. Emails he sends to us are just like him.”

He is himself, & would be even if his brain was affected. Why is sad music still playing?

Everyone is crying. This piano music is not stopping. We have not even met Malcolm yet.

So delighted to hear the disabled person actually talking now. I think this is the only time it happens the whole episode. When he says he’s not able to garden himself now, the host says “In that case we’ll do it for you.“ *sad piano music*

And then, I kid you not, the host pats his shoulder then ADJUSTS HIS BLANKET to cover him up more. The first time I watched this I stopped it here for a bit, I was so mad.

Anyway, next they showcase another garden. I was hoping they’d show a successful wheelchair accessible garden, but instead they focus on a garden that has different flat terraces on a slope...

The host says, “I think that had he been able, this is exactly the kind of garden that Malcolm would have been proud to make for his family.”

Have you asked him, or are you assuming?

Also, again the tragedy of what he could have been “had he been able.”

Host, going down stone stairs at the other garden: “We have to solve the access problem. Malcolm is in a wheelchair, so how do we get him to the top of his garden without the use of steps?”

Seriously? You can’t imagine an alternative to steps? THIS part makes me want to cry.

You literally walked up a fucking ramp a few minutes earlier, in the disabled person’s garden.

I do like the way they show how they’re making the path up the garden wheelchair accessible. This show could be so good if they knew how to avoid inspiration porn and stereotypical tragedy narratives about disability.

I was surprised they didn’t do any raised beds. Malcolm was using his hands with the iBoard, so is there something they could have done to support him to do some light gardening? I don’t know enough to say, but it was something I wondered during this ep.

They keep mentioning what a keen gardener he was, and how he can’t now. I wonder if there’s a way his hobby could have been accommodated.

“Nine year old boys and beautiful gardens don’t often get on, certainly when the boys are kicking footballs around...”

Sorry, what?! That’s some shit gender stereotyping right there, @LoveYourGarden2.

I have to go out but I’ll continue this thread later.

We are only HALFWAY through ONE ep. gif: Alicia Silverstone making an ‘ugh!’ face.

Wait, I’m going to quickly do this next bit before I leave, because it’s the WORST PART. It made me scream the first time I saw it.

So @LoveYourGarden2 want to make the garden more personalised, so they arrange to meet Trish (not Malcolm, not Trish AND Malcolm) at their old house.

Host: “This was the last garden Malcolm was able to work in before he was diagnosed.” (Reminder: tragic!!!!)

Host: “This garden must have happy memories” (of when your husband wasn’t disabled).

*video of Malcolm before disability, sad music*

Host: “how different was life then?”

*video of Malcolm pre disability playing with his son, sad music*

Host: “A huge shock for you. Do you worry about what’s ahead?”

Host: “but the weight is all here (pats her shoulder). It’s all on you. Don’t you feel that at times?”

Sorry, there’s no weight on the disabled person?! I... what the fuck?

And now the KICKER.

Host: “as a nurse... you must have an idea of how long you’ve got.”

THEN:

Host: “Some people might say what’s the point of making a garden for someone who hasn’t got long. Do you think there is a point?”

What the FUUUUUUUUUUUCK

SAD MUSIC

Then the host says, “it’s impossible to know what to say, isn’t it?”

You didn’t have any problem thinking of what to say to Trish a moment ago, did you, you ableist jerk? You get Malcolm out the way, then ask his partner if there’s any point making a garden for him?!

The people making this show shouldn’t be allowed anywhere near another disabled or ill person until they get their shit together.

Okay, now I’m going out. Fuck this show.

Aaaand we’re back to livetweeting this show for a bit before I start work.

So they’re making this garden into a ‘memory garden’ type thing, with these significant dates carved into stone tablets “to remind the family of the great times they’ve had together.”

A memory garden celebrating significant moments might be nice if they hadn’t framed Malcom’s entire life as amazing before he became disabled & horrifically tragic now. Dates carved into stones might have been nice if they hadn’t just made Trish discuss Malcolm’s life expectancy.

“One part of the garden that’s had to stay is the access ramp...we’re helping to disguise it with same colour containers planted up with tree ferns.”

“Our ferns and palms are doing a great job of disguising the ramp.”

What’s with this idea of ‘disguising’ a ramp? Why?

The tree ferns and matching pots look great alongside Malcolm’s red ramp, but why use the word disguising? I didn’t see them discussing the need to disguise stairs in the other garden they visited. Accessibility isn’t something that needs to be hidden or disguised.

Friends come to visit to drop off some hand painted pots. Nice! A good moment until the host says, “Clearly they [Malcolm and Trish] are special friends. They’re quite an inspiration, aren’t they?”

*sigh*

We know why he’s calling them inspiring. Listen to Stella Young, folks.

The young boy’s treehouse is decorated with military stuff! Wtf?! There’s the English flag, a sign with a skull and crossbones saying ‘Danger, Mines’, and a backpack and some sort of hanging fabric in army camouflage colours. Gross.

Guess it fits with the idea that football-playing-boys & ‘lovely gardens’ don’t get along.

Boys and violence & the military, though? Brilliant! They get along so well! Let’s encourage that!

This was such a disturbing choice of decor for a young kid, @LoveYourGarden2.

“We set out to create a garden that would allow this brave family to spend precious time together.”

Brave, inspiring

Of course, we’re hitting all the inspoporn bingo words!