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Have you ever felt loneliness so paralysing, consuming and potent? Like you’re stuck in a very comfortable dark silicone hole, you know you should crawl your way out but you have no idea how to?
I have.
#Thread
I have.
#Thread
Once upon a time, I would complain to God, my sister and my friends about being lonely. Thinking back, I was lonely because there was nothing really exciting happening and I had come to accept that only boys and their attention would add some spice to my boring life.
I was working but that had become a routine. Then I stumbled on an article online about how my alone time is a gift and how to turn it into fertile solitude and live my best life.
Being an adult sucks at this time because no one can save you but yourself.
Being an adult sucks at this time because no one can save you but yourself.
However, once your mind is made up, the process begins.
I told myself to find what else excites me and to begin to create fun times in my life.
So I did.
I wrote down everything I genuinely liked doing, and prioritised them according to which excites me most,
I told myself to find what else excites me and to begin to create fun times in my life.
So I did.
I wrote down everything I genuinely liked doing, and prioritised them according to which excites me most,
so I started from Number 1, which is writing, Number 2, meeting new people…and the list went on and on.
I found myself, pleasurably adrift in this new found solitude, my inner voice became more audible, I was churning out pages of my thoughts and loving it.
I found myself, pleasurably adrift in this new found solitude, my inner voice became more audible, I was churning out pages of my thoughts and loving it.
I also started taking myself to lunch at least once a week. I used to have fun 'people watching' when I was in the university, I learned so much about human interactions that way. Taking myself out to lunch was a way to begin this creative hubby again.
Having listened to thoughts and written them down, I understood that I was special and all shades of amazing so any man I ended up with would have the best time of his life. Why then was I rolling around in the dark silicone hole feeling miserable when I really was blessed?
The next time I picked up a call or made one, I made was no longer the whiny friend and sister; I became the excited person they used to know, the one who always has a lot to say and also enjoys listening.
I refused to waste time on the phone anymore because in the past,
I refused to waste time on the phone anymore because in the past,
I would stretch conversations just so I wouldn’t be alone with myself and my thoughts. Now, I had my writing to go back to, reading about new vacation spots and drawing up a calendar, setting up dates I would go on these trips.
Also,
Also,
I began to think up and strategise on what I could do with all that knowledge and talent I had waiting to exhale inside me.
Like Oprah said “ What’s the smartest thing to do after learning what makes you tick? Waste zero time getting started on living your best life"
Like Oprah said “ What’s the smartest thing to do after learning what makes you tick? Waste zero time getting started on living your best life"
Be careful though, as you begin to enjoy and take advantage of your solitude, you tend to like it a lot. When you eventually meet someone worth giving your time to, it may be difficult letting go of this wonderful space you have created for yourself.
