THE BYSTANDER EFDECT

The bystander effect isn't just limited to witnessing a situation unfold in public where no one is sure if they should step in. I also experienced it when disclosing the abuse to various staff within service providers.
Part 1/6

Part 2:

They were uncomfortable and afraid of saying or doing the wrong thing. So my disclosure was met with blank looks and the basic question of do you want to leave without validating how bad the abuse was or wanting to discuss any other options or fears around leaving.

Part 3:

This only served to make me further question whether what I was experiencing was bad or not as no one was even telling me that what he is doing is a crime.

Part 4:

1. Ask
Sometimes people are actually waiting for anyone to just ask them what is wrong. How did you get that injury?

Part 6:

2. Listen and validate
If something sounds terrible then say so.

Part 6:

REALLY IMPORTANT

If what you are hearing described is a crime then tell them that its a crime.

Part 7:

3. Act
Doing nothing is telling someone that what you've heard is of no concern or its telling someone they have to get themselves out of it.

IMPORTANT

Discuss options and fears and decide on the next step.

Part 8:

4. Follow up
Check in with them to see how they are doing and if they need more help.

All of this is important, it restores dignity to someone who has had their humanity impacted or taken away.

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