I see people doing Scrum ceremony/events/meetings in a "by the book" way (or more often a popular interpretation) and completely failing to meet the **purpose** of those ceremonies
Let's start with Iteration planning

The purpose is to limit work in progress.
Not to "see how much we can get done"/push as many clowns into the car as won't fit

If you can't reasonably use this to limit what you work on for the iteration period you are not meeting the purpose
Daily Scrum

"This is not a status meeting" (but you'd never know it the way most people answer The.Three.Questions)

It's a planning meeting.
A chance each day to reassess based on what was learned yesterday. Small adjustments *to the plan* - not pushing to get back on schedule
Iteration review

This is not a dog and pony show - or a place for celebration theater

The purpose is to get working software in someone's hands (preferably a customer or as close as you can get) and adjust based on feedback

That's right, another chance to adjust the plan
There are 4 great economic answers to look for in a review
1) That's exactly what I asked for.
You gave me 80% of what I thought I needed and the remaining 20% isn't worth the cost. We're done.
Time to change the plan
2) That's exactly what I asked for.
The remaining 20% is still worth the effort.
Keep going
3) That's exactly what I asked for.
And now that I have it in my hands it's not really what I need. Thank you for helping me see this in a short period of time so we don't waste time and money going down that road.
Let's adjust the plan
4) That's not what I asked for.
Thanks for only going down that road for an iteration.
Let's have a better conversation
The output of all of these is an updated plan - not "getting back on plan",
Retrospectives

I live in California and love a good therapy session. Retrospectives are not meant to be a therapy session.

The purpose is to make a plan to adjust how we will work differently next iteration
BTW: There are ways to meet these purposes other than Scrum.

Kanban limits WIP in a flow based manner.
Mob programming gives the team a constant opportunity to adjust based on what's being learned.
Etc.
But if you are choosing to use Scrum - get the most out of it by actually meeting the purpose rather than just the form of the ceremonies
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