Us Somali men want to marry somali women but we’re not looking to change ourselves or even meet them halfway and that’s the problem. Instead, we claim Somali women are feminists and “western”.

It’s easy to play the tic for tac game which won’t get no one anywhere but it’s much harder to be understanding and understand where the other person is coming from. And help us adapt to get what we want.

Some of us might be too prideful to change or some of us might even think that meeting someone halfway is you being “feminine” or not a “man”. When that is a sign of maturity and having understanding which both is part of being a man.

Displaying leadership and making sure both parties are happy and fair. We cling onto “culture” and claim we’re following Islam.

There’s an abundance of Somali women who are single who want to marry us and an abundance of us Somali men who are single who want to marry them but we’re not meeting them halfway.

We are the leaders therefore we should be the initiators. We refuse and lack communication. We have a sense of pride to us and don’t want to put our pride aside in getting the things we want,

when part of getting what you want is learning to put your pride aside and communicating and negotiating. Just you being a man solely by design doesn’t qualify you to get what you want. And that’s where we fail.

When we don’t get what we want, we claim Somali women are feminists or “western”. We’re busy clinging onto culture. We cannot claim Somali women are not following Islam and are “feminists” when we as men are not following Islam but rather following culture.