Food Addiction
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So, I still have issues with food.

I see people buy things from concession stands and food carts and such, and I think "man, I could just have that."

It's hard to explain the *feeling* behind that thought, but for a small moment...
I feel like it was ok to be overweight. Like it was worth it for that food.

And I don't mean "worth it" like "damn that would be yummy lolz"

I mean like "who gives a fuck, get fat again, it's worth it to eat like trash."

And this feeling is honestly a bit terrifying.
I absolutely hate referring to it as "food addiction", because it sounds like a fat person joke, and because food is necessary for everybody. It would be like saying you're addicted to water.

But food addiction is about abusing food, not just eating it.
I've noticed that addiction is difficult to understand for many people unless they are an addict.

The level of self-sabotage an addict can and will enact for the sake of a high can be unfathomable.

Morbidly obese people are actively ruining their quality of life.
They're doing it just to get high.

The problem is that this high becomes the normal. Instead of feeling good with it, you feel normal with it or shitty without it. https://twitter.com/Landpriv/status/1194346682663632896?s=19
I get really annoyed at those who view the morbidly obese as simply lazy and gluttonous.

You don't get that way without a lot of eating for a long period of time, and you don't eat like that all the time unless you're using food to solve other problems.
That doesn't mean that everybody who is morbidly obese is a food addict.

Some people have eating disorders.

Some people grew up with poor eating habits from obese parents.

Many likely want to avoid thinking about why they overeat.

But some are addicts.
We need to respect that food addiction is a thing. Even non-addicts can use food to cope in unhealthy ways, due to bad habits.

Morbid obesity is a complex, multi-layered issue. Many know why they overeat, deep down, but can't/won't try to heal. I didn't, for most of my life.
But food addiction is still a battle, and will likely always be a battle for me in some way.

I'm ok with that, to an extent. The feeling I described earlier has one benefit: it reminds me that I can't get comfortable.

Not many people come with a built-in "cold slap" mechanism.
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