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People often seem freaked that my office looks out onto a graveyard (my church owns and operates a large cemetery). I actually find it very peaceful and pretty. It is also a means to engage more of the public, sometimes in the most surprising of ways. Today, for instance...
I was looking out the window and saw a young couple standing near one of our recently erected columbariums - a structure containing niches for ashes. They were weeping - not an uncommon sight in cemeteries. I waited and watched them a while, weeping together out in the cold...
I put on my coat, went out and walked around, giving them space but letting them know I was there, watching for any signs they wanted to be left alone. I approached quietly. The woman's head was on the man's chest. I caught his eye and smiled. He smiled back. I introduced myself.
They came back to my office with me and we talked. Their baby died not long after his birth and they had his ashes interred in our cemetery. Neither are religious nor do they have close family in Canada and so they didn't have a funeral. I asked if there was anything I could do..
"Would you bless the baby?" she asked. He said: "I know we aren't part of your church and can't call ourselves Christians..." (It always saddens me that the church has left so many thinking that we're a "Members Only Club" and any help we give comes with an obligation to join)
We talked about the pregnancy, the birth, why they chose the name they did, his death, their grief, and planned a small ceremony to be had in my church - just the three of us - that's all they want there. Then we'll go out and bless the niche.
I share this because I want people to know amidst all the scandals and bigotry and guilting of people, what so many of us in the church do, day in and day out, is simply meet people where they are and offer what help we can. It doesn't always (or often) result in "new members".
And for many of us, that's absolutely fine, because our faith isn't a product we're selling; it's just the well we draw from to quench our own thirst and the water we offer to others who are thirsty - if they want it. After they drink, they leave and we may never see them again
and that's ok because in those fleeting moments, when compassion meets pain, skepticism gives way to trust, grief gives way to peace and strangers become momentarily friends, then God -what I call God -is there, reaching out to touch and be touched. That for me is the Incarnation
And if I was able to see that and someone else was able to see it, even if they don't call it by the same name as I do, then we "followed Jesus" and were blessed by him. I am grateful for fellow Christians who minister every day to others like that, just giving what they have...
...and giving the lie to the idea that "to be religious" has to mean judging, proselytizing, controlling and harming. That isn't what Jesus did and it's not what his followers are called to do.
Pray for Alexander and his parents
Pray for Alexander and his parents
