fuck it. runaways as shit i’ve heard at school thread

nico: i have the energy of a small kitchen appliance
molly: what kind?
nico: one that isn’t plugged in

karolina: what are some goals y’all have
chase: i wanna be the first astronaut on the sun
gert: the first and the last one apparently
the group: *wheeze*

molly: to make butter you just need to shake a cow a little bit

alex: i almost died yesterday and it was the highlight of my weekend

gert: god is looking at his big “natural disaster” button and he’s just itching to press it right now

alex, picking up a plastic container:
chase: dude that’s my deodorant
alex: it’s literally glue

chase, just as gert is opening the door: ive never yoted a baby before
gert:
chase:
chase: hi

karolina: but it’s chase’s dream you should help him achieve his dream
nico: i’m here to crush his dream

karolina: you are all becoming accessories in a murder right now you know that right

chase: how is the cold war a war if there was no fighting?
molly: it was a flex war

nico: are you having an awful day
alex: yea
nico: EXCELLENT

molly: u can drink your own pee 4 times before there’s no water left
chase: what do u mean no water left like right now i’m just imagining someone pissing dust

molly: in the future voting will just be one giant game of kahoot

chase: albert einstein was the best president
everyone:
chase: also abraham lincoln was a vampire slayer

karolina: DON’T PUT SUPERGLUE ON LITTLE KIDS’ FACES

chase: every beach is a nude beach if you’re not a coward

molly: one of these days nico’s gonna snap
nico: what makes you think i haven’t already

gert: the purge, but like, 24/7

chase: is that jesus
karolina: THAT’S JOHN LENNON

nico: did you steal it
chase: no i just grabbed it to mess around with it and then i forgot to put it back
nico: so you stole it
chase: NO I DIDN’T

alex: are you eating a napkin
molly:

nico: bye i’m gonna go drink paint thinner
karolina: NOOOOO

chase: our clock is still broken. welcome to purgatory

gert: what should you NOT wear in the workshop
chase: clothes
gert:
chase: wait