THREAD: It was sometime around Halloween in 1999 that I had a friend break up with me. He said he didn't want to be friends anymore because I had too many problems and he had too many problems of his own (among them: being a bad friend).

I'm sure I had been clingy and needy. I had a crush on him, which he didn't reciprocate. A simple, "We can be friends but I'm not interested in romance" would have sufficed, but hey, we were both closeted BYU students. Neither of us was in a good place, emotionally.

My feelings were hurt, but I got over it. I went on to be treated much worse by much handsomer people.

But I was proud of myself because NOT ONCE did I ever try to contact him after that. We even had friends in common, so it would have been easy to say, "Tell [this guy] I said hello." He'd probably have been open to reconciliation after years had passed. But I'm a man of my word.

You don't want to be friends with me? I WILL NOT BE FRIENDS WITH THE HELL OUT OF YOU.

And it's not a grudge! If he ever reached out to me, I'm sure I'd accept it. But he said he didn't want me to contact him anymore, so I haven't. I am a man of my word.

Anyway, the reason I'm sharing this is that it's been 20 years and this is by far the longest commitment I've ever kept, the end.

When he dies, I think going to his funeral would be OK, as that's not contacting him. A seance would be inappropriate, however.