All right. It’s time. I’ve never seen a full episode of #StarTrek TOS and I’m doing it today, for @thisismewhatevs. Watching 2x01, one of the most famous episodes of television ever and live tweeting it

Want to reiterate that I have never seen even a single video fragment from this episode

This is a really beautifully shot series and I fucking love 60s aesthetics and all the visuals of basically every show shot in the 1960s.

“If he were not a Vulcan, I’d almost say nervous.” Hmm. Let me just say that all Trek doctors are so fucking valid. Bones is already one of my favorite characters and he’s spoken only one (1) sentence

“That just sounds like Mr. Spock in one of his contemplative phrases.” Oh okay. Loving the implication that he knows what’s up because he *knows*

Cool, this is officially a Bones stan account. Bones is just trying to do his job, Spock threatens to snap his neck, and Kirk is like “oh shit my boyfriend said that uhhh hmmm doesn’t sound like him”

I’m gonna guess this is a positively explosive gesture for a Vulcan to lose control and toss his soup against the wall, and scare whoever this blonde lady is. High fucking scandal hours here

Oh and now Spock is requesting a leave of absence??? Like take me to Vulcan, right now. I’m also guessing his lil boyfriend isn’t gonna divert this ship without a reason. This face? Gay Concern

Glad we’ve all fully established how hard the Star Trek opening theme slaps. Star Trek didn’t have to go this hard for us and yet they did. Can we give thanks for this opening theme? Cool as shit. Dancing pumpkin man makes an appearance bc it’s Oct

Edit: I’ve been informed by my sources this is the First Lady of Star Trek, issuing an early correction in this thread so I do not offend. I mean no disrespect. Just didn’t catch her name. I stand corrected @thisismewhatevs this is why I have a guide to Trek

The tension in this scene is real fuckin thick. Love how Kirk just carries on as if he didn’t hear anything Spock says. “In all the years that I’ve known you” did you not hear me the first time???

Cool cool so Spock is gonna keep pushing for his leave on Vulcan and he thinks he’s not gonna have to tell Kirk about it. Ha ha ha ha oh that’s cute. The distinctive twang of a 60s guitar comes in

Just want to reiterate again that I am in my mid 30s and have never seen a single episode of the original series - so if I sound like an idiot making my way through this that’s because I am

“Spock... I’m asking... what’s wrong?” Am I seeing this shit with my own two gay eyes?! The tension ! The pull between these two!!! It’s thick as molasses!

Spock: “I need... rest. I’m asking you to accept that answer” .... which is so obviously and blatantly a lie. And I’m sorry. Wait. Do they always stand this close? Is there always this much barely contained sexual tension between them? I’m guessing yes

Bitch!! The captain is taking them directly to Vulcan without getting a real explanation from Spock. If that ain’t love I don’t know what is.

How is it possible she is more beautiful every time I see her face. Lieutenant Uhura, please - and I cannot stress this enough - kill me, snap my neck with your bare hands

My sources have also informed me that yes, there is always this much barely contained sexual tension between Spock and Kirk and yes, they always do stand this close. I’m understanding more about why fanfic exists now

Oh no. Now there’s insufficient time to stop off at Vulcan, which appears like it’s gonna be a big motherfucking problem

Fuck I paused it to tweet and lost the remote.

Watching this feels like literal time travel because everyone I know knows about this and I do not. Hi it’s me I come from a green planet and I am catching up on this shit

Have some bad news which is that I lost my remote and I have a doctors appointment in twenty minutes but I’ll be back

I found the remote. Okay. So now Kirk is telling Spock that they have to go to the other planet and not Vulcan

Does he always recline in his quarters so.... gayly? I’m gonna take a guess and say yes

Oh wait so Spock ordered them to go to Vulcan and didn’t tell - OH SHIT the captain’s got his hands on his hips. That ain’t good

“You’ve changed course for Vulcan, Mr. Spock, why?” Another question, why are you two standing so close in this elevator

“I’m trying to help you”

“Ask me no further questions, I will not answer”

So that little dialogue was basically picked up and inserted into DS9’s The Wire and yeah I’m good with that, it’s gay; I love it

So far I relate most to Bones, who is clearly just trying to do his fuckin job. Also Spock’s fingers are twitching all over the place

“Jim, you’ve got to get Spock to Vulcan! Right away!”

“He’ll die, Jim!”

basic Kirk: TELL ME WHAT’S WRONG WITH MY BOYFRIEND AREN’T YOU A DOCTOR?

Watching Spock go through the stages of grief in realizing he’s gonna have to tell Kirk about this is really really something. We’re like 1/4 of the way thru this episode and he hasn’t told him yet

This music as “it has to do with biology” is just wow what a setup

“... as in reproduction?”

Oh fuck the look on his face, he’s - ahhhh - the second hand embarrassment is so real

Wow. Star Trek invented gay panic. the gayest panic in Kirk’s eyes. “Ice cold, play it cool, don’t give yourself away”

This really really really long REALLY awkward explanation that just keeps getting longer and more awkward is ...

“Return home... take a wife... or die” and with these words Trek really did it to us all

Oh god. His posture. This whole - I’m so soft and sad. He’s just like completely and utterly mortified isn’t he?

The good news is I’m not even halfway through this episode and I feel like I’m losing my mind

The bad news is I gotta go to a doctors appointment and I’ll be back in about an hour

The woman who got me into Star Trek is an icon l, - have no choice but to be in constant awe

Sorry for the delay but my back was hurting a lot and we were hungry so we stopped for sushi on the way home. The live tweeting will resume soon

ALL RIGHT BITCHES IM BACK TO AMOK TIME sorry for the delay I had to go to the Doctor

This is ... certainly a study in contrast. “I’m so overcome by hormones I’m gonna smash this comms unit” and we love brooding Spock with what I assume is some sort of cool-ass Vulcan musical instrument, that shit is cool

They’re trying to get to Vulcan without explaining this shit, aren’t they?

Oh now and Kirk is gonna DEFY THE ORDERS TO GET TO VULCAN. OKAY THAT’S LOVE.

I fucking love Bones. He knows some shit is about to go down and he’s just like well, here I am stuck on this starship just trying to do my DAMN job i feel like this is my default face for getting through life tbh, highly relatable

She cares about him huh. She even made him Vulcan soup, which he disgracefully tossed against a wall. But girl, you might be in danger. I hope she’s not in danger here

Oh no please don’t cry I’m gonna cry. Is every woman in this series so beautiful that I want to die? y/y? Yes

“Your face is wet.”
Oh no now he’s asking Christine to make him some soup again wow okay cool, It’s cool to make me cry like this

“You’d find it’s distasteful”

“Would I?”

Tag yourselves I’m Bones staring directly into space just trying to do my fucking job

Would you beam down to the planet’s surface!???! Oooooh SHIT

Aw he said it’s his right to have his best friend and he asked both Kirk and Bones to come down. Aw I’m soft.

Jesus Christ. Hello, T’Pring. Please - and I cannot stress this enough - murder me immediately with a Vulcan nerve pinch

Cause of death: Lieutenant Uhura
how do you people keep your blood pressure down while watching this!?

Can’t believe Star Trek invented bisexual lighting. She is my wife! Oh shit! What’s the backstory here

My man Bones, looking around and trying to figure out when he’s gonna be able to do his job again I immediately feel these looks deep down in my tired old soul

Okay we’re on Vulcan. This music is absolutely dope. Super cool shit. Love the music so much

“Less than a marriage, but more than a betrothal” these facial expressions are absolutely killing me

So now he’s talking about touching, the minds being joined together. I love all the awkward silence and glances. Ooh here comes the wedding party

I fully expected nothing less than this quality of Looks from the Vulcans but I do need to pause a moment to talk about some of these absolute fucking looks. Who is she? T’Pau, who is clearly a Boss of some type

I don’t know how homosexuals watch this series without combusting. I’m gonna catch on fire. Please, step on me, I beg you

We stan a lovely tiddie window. 10/10

Oh hell yeah. Hell yeah

I love how Kirk looks sensual, curious, and perhaps aroused, and Bones is still like, aw what the fuck man

Jesus fucking Christ I’m gay

“Are our ceremonies for outsiders?” No, all right, we get it, these two dudes are not really dressed well enough to be here but, it’s apparently okay, Spock vouches for them and they walk forward

Incredible looks being served

“What you are about to see... the Vulcan heart, the Vulcan soul” listen bitch I’m getting a distinct feeling my ass is not prepared at all for what I’m about to see here on this planet okay

Oh, oh, wait a minute here - I don’t know what the fuck is happening but this looks pretty damn serious

Oh shit! I know hands are really significant for Vulcans and T’Pring has her hand fucking OUT. what’s happening. I get the sense this is not what’s supposed to happen right now