A #brexit story with #flags, in english, with the amazing translation of @240185

1950
"We got our ass kicked badly this time. Never do this again, eh?"
"Ach, Ich agree"
ceases Occupation of Saarland
cast ECSC
invite
"WTF, what's that shit?"

"Don't care, won't work anyway"
cast EEC and Euratom
"What can I do to piss them off?"

1960
casts EFTA
join EFTA
casts Customs Union

1961
"May I play with y'all?"
"Piss off"
"Ya sure?"
"I know him, he's a punk. He keeps breaking my toys since 1066. I swear to God he won't enter"
"Don't care, don't want to join your shitty club anyway"

Later
casts Common Agricultural Policy
forgets Customs Fees
fusions with ECSC and Euratom
casts Community Executive Power
"Please, can I come?"
"Die"
"B-but…"

drops Charles de Gaulle
cast Adhesion Request to
drop EFTA
EFTA: "What?"
"Punk's not dead"

join
"Welcome… Hey, One's missing!"
"Nah, I don't like you actually"
"Whatever"
casts Ill man of Europe
casts Winter of Discontent
"HELP!!"
casts Financial help
replenishes itself
casts Iron Lady

Even later
casts European Parliament elected by Direct Universal Suffrage
slains Dictatorship of Colonels
drops Salazar
"May I come?"
joins
drops Franco
"What about us?"
join
drops EFTA

EFTA: "Waaaah, nobody loves me :'("
"You're ugly and useless"
EFTA: "Fuck you, you created me!"
"I don't know who you are, madam; I never saw you"
finished Healing with Financial Help
"Burp."

Even laterer
"Well, everyone needs to contribute to the budget so newcomers can develop and help deindustrialised regions."
casts European Budget
"What!? I must pay to drink here?!"
"Here we go… Care to stop being annoying?"
"NO!"
casts Iron Mule

"I want my money back"
"No"
sulks
casts obstruction diplomacy
is paralyzed!
"Fuck, you're annoying"
"Punk's not dead"

casts British rebate
"WHAT! That's unfair! #MyBallsOnAPlate"
casts Common Agricultural Policy on
"omnomnom… What were we talking about?"
"Good. How about a common currency?"
"Yeah, and we would call it 'Écu'"
"løl"

"B-but…"
drops Valéry Giscard d'Estaing
"I don't want your shitty euro. I'm keeping my pound."
"As you wish"
"Don't want it"
"Yeah, understood. You're not entitled to."
"Really don't want it"
"You're annoying."

"But give me European institutions, like Banking authority, for example."
"You're not even in the single currency system!"
"Don't care. Gimme, or I get moody."
"What did I bloody say?"
"STFU"

Even laterererer
"Everything has been liberalized, but my people is gritty. What will I say to them?"
casts Europhobic press
casts European diktat
casts It's not me, it's Brussels
"Huh? But you decided with us!"
"Shut up, it's technical."

gets European disinterest
"Move your ass here, we're gonna get Saddam"
"Why?"
"Shut up, it's technical."
casts Evidence of Weapons of Mass Destruction
undergoes Stupid war for bad reasons
"¡Ay Caramba!"

undergoes Discontent
undergoes Freedom Fries
"Fuck, this will blow up on our faces."
"Nah, I handle it."
casts con't care about anything
casts Subprimes
"We are rich!"
gets lehman brothers
"Uh, no, we are poor."
casts Global Recession as a gift

"Goddammit, can't they keep their banks clean?"
"HELP! GIB MONIES!"
"Fuck, it's hardcore in there"
casts Temporary Nationalizations
takes damage on Euro
"OK, let's help everyone or we'll all get fucked"
"I'M GONNA DIE!"

"Grrr, OK."
"Nope. Don't like 'em. Euro does not even concern me."
"You took advantage and this crisis is your fault too, with your shitty Banking regulations. Come help!"
"Nah."
"I want an Europe à la carte anyway."

"Duh?"
"I wanna take what I like, leave you what I don't like, and I want to pay even less."
"Are you aware this is a package?"
"Yeah. So what?"
"You know, treaties and all that stuff. You must contribute."
"Gonna sulk…"
"Stop it!"

casts Massive Financial Help
"Easy with my money, eh?"
"Argh, you're so mean!"
"What if everyone paid taxes in your country?"
"B-but…"
cast Painful Reforms
drops Bankers in Jail

"Let's talk about me, would ya?"
"Are you in Dire Straits?"
"Nah. Why?"
"Well?"
"I WANT YOU TO TAKE CARE OF ME!!"
"Sorry, not sorry. Everything is on fire!"
"I don't love you anyway. You never were my mother!"
"WTF?"

casts Promises of Referendum
"I have a bad feeling about this"
"Nah, they're not THAT dumb!"
"We're actually talking about people who eat English food and enjoy it."
"Nah, there are limits…"
casts Referendum
"Oh, no, no."

"Are you going to spit on all we brought you in order to be alone?"
"I am the eternal England!"
"HEY!!!"
"Shut up you underlings, I'm in command"

"They can't be possibly doing that?"
"You don't know them."
"It's not rationally possible. Can you imagine the mess?"
casts Vote
gets Brexit
"Punk's not dead"
"Scheiße"
"Told you so."

"It's not possible to be THAT dumb!"
"Hold my beer."
casts Donald J. Trump
"Oh."
"Ha! Ha! Ha! Never felt so FREE! I can do whatever I want now!"

casts Article 50
"I had something called the Good Friday Agreement."
: "Hey."
"Shut up you underlings, I'm in command"
casts Michel Barnier
casts European Unity
casts Preparing to Negotiate
"You have two years."

casts Promises of Super Duper Agreement
casts Big Fiesta
gets Hangover
drops Boris Johnson
drops Nigel Farage
"Where are all those nitwits who promised me all the good things?"
"Well, let's do as usual: making it a mess."

casts Dissension on
is immune
"WHAT! You were supposed to be an antivaxx!"
"Nah, it's me. Everyone has a dumb side."
gets Lateness
gets Incompetent Ministers
gets Paralyzed Political Affairs

"Well, let's prepare for this, eh?"
casts Moving European Institutions
casts Customs in Calais
"Ha ha! Told you that I could sign agreements!"
gets Agreement with New Zealand
"Don't you have something more important to do?"
"Nah."

negotiate
get Agreement
"Not too bad. There's this thing with Ireland, but that will do."
drops Agreement
"Scrub the credit card."
drops Agreement
"What's your fucking problem?"

"ANSWER!"

drops Agreement

"I don't know how you can keep cool. Even I would have kicked his ass, and I am a pacifist."
"You're not helping."

"EU sucks, Brexit rocks!"
"Is it the party for annoying people?"
"Told you s…"
"Say it and I will Article 50 your face."
casts Whining for delay
"OK, but work seriously this time."

casts Wanking
"I'm gonna kill him"
"I want to say a thing."
"Fuck at last."
"I want out."
"OK, I didn't want it in first place, but now, please do."
"What will you give me to get out?"
"Huh? Are you fucking kidding me?"

"I have this idea of an European army…"
"Don't tempt me, this is not the time. But keep this idea, just in case."
"If you don't give me something, I'll sulk."
"Can I hit him?"
casts Whining for a last delay

"This is the last, and now work really seriously now."
casts Boris Johnson
"Now I know what depression means."

"Hey buddy! *fart*"
"Hey my friend! *fart*"
"*farts and lol and trade agreement*"
"Do you mind?"
casts Tariffs on
"Well done lol."
"You're affected too."
"HahaWHAT"
"Punk's not dead"

"Well, you won't give me anything. Hey, Ireland, it's bullshit. Drop the good friday Agreement."
"HEY!"
"Not in your dreams."
"It's your fault if we don't have an agreement. Not mine."
"I'm not paid enough."

"I'm warning you, on the 31st of October, it's O-VER."
"You can't say what I have to do. If I'm doing a No-Deal, I'm free to do it!"
"Hello, I'm the Parliament and I don't agree with what he said."

"Is it Inside Out?"
"Nah, it's nothing. Nobody. You want no deal, you'll get it."
"I actually heard someone."
"Me too."

"We don't agree with No Deal."
"Then you will sign an agreement with a backstop?"
"No. Why?"
"What do you want???"
weeps
"NO DEAL" - "AN AGREEMENT"
casts Prevention plan for CVAs

casts Prorogating the Parliament
"IN YOUR FACE!"
"Ahem."
"What?"
"That's illegal."
"Do you want me to shove Mary Stuart more deeply in your face?"
casts Declaration of illegality
"He can do that?"

EFTA casts psychotherapy
EFTA "That fucking bastard, he said I'm ugly and useless, after all I did for him"
EFTA "Are you listening ?"
"Can you stop complaining ? We can't follow the hearings at the Supreme Court"
EFTA "BWAAAHH"

"Well, you are asked to return your proposals by the end of September."
"I got a plan."
"Are you kidding me?"
"Gives then."
"Nah"
"All is well, I'm fine ..."
"But why?"
"Because it's secret."
"I ..."
"Why did I take over the presidency ?"

"Why are you all green?"
"I'm disguised as Hulk, it's cool, huh"
"Okaaayyyyy, is there a reason?"
"Yeah, Hulk is super crazy and super strong."
"And how is it helping us ?"
"I can't hear you"
"Giving UE contribution to the NHS, not that stupid eventually"

"Aaah, the ruling of Supreme Court, you're gonna see who was right, you pussies, and I..."
"Guess what ?"
"We won!"
"Non, we lost!"
"He was already a pain in the arse alone, if he gets a multiple personality disorder..."

"Can you stop that nonsense!"
"Nah, I'm going to end this, don't move any closer !"
"We onnly want the best for you, come on"
"What does he want, again ?"
"He wants to commit suicide after the decision."
"We must stop him !"
"Aaah, really we have to?"

"I'm warning you, I've a weapon, one more step and it will be over!"
"He looks pretty serious"
"Why are you even caring?"
"Fuck, you really have no compassion!"
"Oh yeah? he's trying to commit suicide by eating a pudding dish ..."

"Ok, you get it, Parliament is back in the game"
"Yeah, come here, your're gonna be sooo screwed after what you did!"
"Oh yeah, well, I'm going to follow the rulling, but I still think the Supreme Court is a bunch of douchebags!"
"Oh, Shocking!"
"And muppets, too!"

Meanwhile, in New York, meeting of the Democracy Therapy Group
"Well, remember, we listen to each other without being judgmental."
"Well, it's not pretty, but I try to break the knees of my judges to make them obey, well, there is who hits me hard"

"Ahaha, it's a joke, I've smashed the constitutional court, we're corrupted to the core and I control the press, well, is yelling at me, strong."
"You sissies, I had an Allied country to investigate my Democratic opponent to crush him during the campaign"

"It reminds me of a story that starts with Watersomething."
"Well, I have an impeachment procedure upon my head"

"Bunch of pussies ... I suspended Parliament for 3 weeks, with the approval of the Queen"
"Waaaaahh, groovy"
"Well, the Supreme Court smashed me up, but luckily I have the most stupid opposition in the world."
"Have you understood the purpose of this group?"

"That's it, I have a plan for the Irish border"
"Are you kidding?"
"And a good plan, a great plan, plan from a genius"
"Hold-on, show us before"
"And the solution is ... no border;"
"Fuck, wake up, he saw the light."
"Hey, what, wait, get me a coffee."

"Who saw the light?"
"Guess who ! , he has a solution!"
chews the coffee beans directly
"A solution not totally wacky?"
"Yeah!"
"Are they taking the backstop then?"
"He said no border"
"Really, he said those words ?"
"Yes"

"Fuck, I'm gonna burn the annual Portugal's out of candles to the glory of St. Rita"
"We were so right to believe until the very end"
"We will just put custom processing centres within 10-15 km of the border"
"Basically, a border, with chekpoints, but at 10-15 km"

"Yeah, that's it"
"And each fucking time, I get caught, can't believe how stupid I am"
"Going back to bed, huh!"
"But, what did I say wrong ? My idea of ​​border not at the border is great, isn't it ?
"Really, I can't punch him in the face?"

"So, did you show your plan?"
"Yeah, the best I have, anyway, the only one who would be accepted at Home"
"Not sure the European Parliament will accept it, they did not look enthusiastic"
"At least I will have tried, seriously, for once."

"Are you really going to leave?"
"There's no other choice"
"You will have bothered us from the start, anyway"
"Both of us, it's a long story"
"Yeah, 1066?"
"You see, you started it"
"As if you had never returned the compliment"

"Sure, the hundred years war, the Americas, that let some scars"
"Do you remember fighting side by side during the Crusades?"
Ça "It did not last long, your Philippe Auguste fucked me so much and I lost Richard Coeur de Lion to one of yours crossbowmen"

"Makes us even, you took me one of only two decent emperors I ever had"
"Napoleon III? ... no I'm kidding, please don't hit me, nevertheless, it brought us closer, at the very end"
"In the trenches ... yeah and even after, you did not let me down"

"Well, we are fighting, plundering, killing, murdering and we end up with tight bonds."
"It would have been easier to let me down, perhaps, for you"
"Don't know, it did not seem fair to me, and I was not going to let the mustache worm crush Europe under his boot."

"You have been my best enemy and my worst ally, or maybe the other way , but the story goes on, so, next time, my friend?"
"See you next time, brother."

"Well, law doesn't matters, I'll not ask for a delay"
"You're sure ? because your plan is somewhat bullshit and it'll not pass"
"I don't give a damn, I'm a stable genius, you want the no-deal, you're going to get it, no delay"
"Seriously, you're harming yourself"

"We've been getting ready since the beginning, it's going to be itchy for us, but that's all, and you do not seem to be ready"
"Listen to me, you virgin goats, I do not want a delay, or a postpone, nothing !"
"Guys, let it be, he wants to go out, so be it"

At least, he is able to stand firm on something "
"Well, if he does not want a delay, we'll have to accept it"
"You .. you agree to my wish?"
"Yeah, if that's what you want"
"So, I want a delay"
hits

casts hearings of new commissioners
"May I know WHY I don't have one?
"I gave you MPs, you sent me your best shit bags, I will not get you a commissioner"
"Come on, the French candidate is a rotten one".

rejects Sylvie Goulard
"Heeeeyyy and the presumption of innocence?"
"No, but I ... but WHAT DO YOU WANT ??? !!"
"So, can I have the seat?"
"But you're leaving at the end of the month !!"
"So what?"
"Fuck, he pisses me off"

"If you want, I can help?
"What do you mean by help?"
"You know, I will make him an offer he can't refuse"
"Wait, you're talking about ..."
"I'm not superstitious, but if an unfortunate accident should happen to him ..."
"I ... no"
"You hesitated"

"My Government's priority has always been to secure the departure of the United Kingdom's from the European Union on the 31 of October."
"Perfect, the Queen said, you bunch of old cows. So, who is the Boss?"
"And you really have that secure thing?"
"Yeah!"

"I expect your worst"
casts Leave me alone, I commit suicide with Salmiakki Kossu
"I'm giving you to Northern Ireland"
"Duh?"
"Wait, what did he say?"
ULSTER "Wait? What? Bring your sorry ass here!"
"I have my Queen card, I have immunity"

"Anyway, you cost me too much and you're only a pain in the ass"
ULSTER "I remind you that I got your government by the balls !!"
"I do not care, I will buy others, the French justice asseses their value to 6.700 €, even with inflation, I can afford two"

"Shouldn't we intervene?"
casts Popcorn
"Go ahead, please"
"It's a disaster!"
"Well, go!"
"You, there, you're neutral, you know how to calm them, right?"
"Oh yeah, my management of the Walloons and Flemings was soooo commendable"

" then"
"K, I take one to hit the other?"
"Aren't you neutral?"
"It's not synonymous with patsy!"
"And you're not in "
"You, can't you help?

"Certainly not, he ruined my life for 600 years, I'm not dealing with it"
"I drink to that"
"But ... but ..."
"Drink, you'll feel better"
"Yeah, there's who brought something nasty, well, it dissolves the glass, but it wakes you up"
vomit
"My shoes!!!"

"That's it !!! We have this agreement, wasn't expecting really"
"For real?"
"Flmblbl se on ihan mulkku jätkä."
"What does he say?"
"Don't pay attention, the last months were a bit harsh when you are the had of the Union. Ah, there you are congratulations !!"

"Shut up!"
"Why?"
"You'll wake them up !!!"
"But who?"
"Them !!"
"Wait, I don't understand"
"RULE BRITANNIA!
BRITANNIA RULE THE WAVES
BRITONS NEVER, NEVER, NEVER SHALL BE SLAVES. "
"Too late!"

"Who are you?"
"I am the Commons!"
"You must be happy then, we have an agreement that avoids a hard brexit, you even took a law to avoid it"
"No, I made a law to annoy BoJo, I have no intention to accept that peculiar agreement"

"I thought you wanted an exit agreement"
"Yes, but not that one!"
"And which one do you want?"
"No idea"
"Among the Labor, is there someone constructive?"
"We, in the Labor, we want an agreement, but only if BoJo gets out"
"Constructive, huh?"

"And the Lib Dem?"
"We want an agreement, but only if we stay in the Union AND BoJo gets out"
"If I summarize your points, I've made that for nothing?"
"Oh no, I'm going to have general elections that will ruin Labor and I will stay prime minister"

"Actually, you had planned everything from the beginning, hand't you?"
"It's a possibility"
"LEAVE ME, I'M GONNA BUTCHER HIM !!!"
"Run, I'm holding him back"
"Punk is not dead"

"Is fine?"
"Yeah, I locked him up with a double dose of an horse aenestesia drug"
"You mean a dose for an horse ?"
"nope.. and what's that?"
"A letter from "
"What does he say?"
"He wants a delay"
"Fuucckk, well, it was expected"
"Yeah, but"

"But ?"
"No signature on it "
"Oh, that's weird, even for him"
"We received a letter from "
"It must be the corrected version, what does it say?"
"That he sent the first because he is obliged by law"
"Okay, I understand better"

"We received a letter from "
"Welllll, what does it say?"
"We can go to hell like the turds we are and he will not ask for a delay"
"Oh, this one, at least we know it's from the hand of BoJo"
"What do we do now?"

"Tell me, it's totally normal if I just saw in a rowing boat with a knife between the teeth, grumbling about bringing back a blond scalp ? I did not understand everything due to the insults"
"But but, but, you didn't stop him ??"
"If it relieves him, it suits me"

"We must vote this schedule for examining the draft Brexit withdrawal agreement"
"No"
"Die"
"Kiss my arse"
"But for fuck's sake, how do you want me to get a delay if I have not, at least, that?"
"Donn't give a shit"
"What do you want ?"

"Brexit"
"Staying in "
"To make your life miserable"
"I ... why are you laughing?"
"Don't know, maybe a feeling of déjà vu"
"It's ugly, very uglywhat youre doing, you should be ashamed"
"Shame is sweet"

"It 's hard to admit it, but we will have to postpone Brexit again"
"Can't we invade them instead?"
"No, the troops don't want to be fed with English food once there, they threatened to mutiny"
"And Bojo?"

"One day, it's yes, another, it's no, probably cosplaying Two-Face,
"And how do you get out of that shit? No, put down the flamethrower."
"I find you really conciliatory."
"No, it's the smell of burnt meat, can't stand it since Joan of Arc"

"We can't abandon them!"
"Stop it, everyone knows you don't care, you're just scared not selling your big sedans"
"But noo! I'm for mediation, have always been"
"Anschluss"
"Bless you!"
dies laughting

"You are just mean"
"Does not help, what do we do?"
"We give him a delay, no choice, no deal exist is a non sense and I will not make this gift to that moron"
"Yeah, but we give him no dates, so he sweats a little "
"Vicious"
"Yes and?"

"But it's clear though!"
"Yeah, Guinness is more transparent than your words, tell me that again"
"Zgbbluuf?"
Et "And if anyone can find s dried frog pills, his nerves are put to the test.

"Very simple, I'm going to hold general elections to have a majority in Parliament and adopt the brexit plan."
"Okay, no worries, but I've some trouble with the process, you told me that your request for a general election will be rejected."

"Yeah"
"And you do not see the problem?"
"No"
sobs in a corner
"The Parliament will also make a request for a general election ... after rejecting mine"
"Let's admit, does that mean they will vote for general elections?"
"Oh no"

"What do you mean, oh no?"
"The last time I wanted to turn them upside down, I got bawled, so, now I respect the freedom of Parliament"
"Okay, but what are they going to vote?"
"Well, they don't really know!"
"And, who will be elected?"
"Probably douchebags"

󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿 "Can I say something?"
"Honestly, I like you, very much but it's not really the best idea"
"Yeah, it would be nice if we did not talk about provincial independence too much, huh? Stop exporting your shit !!!"

"Listen , it's not possible, you'll never hold until December 31st!"
"But let me stop this meatbag, I promise, I'll clean the red juice that comes out of it"
"Do not call him meatbag"
"Have you looked at him?"

"How am I going to have a brexit if you kill him, what do we get ?"
"A fleeting but salutary relief?"
"We could have worse than BoJo in his place!"
"Do you mean we could have a chance to bury Farage?"
"December 31st seems sooooo far"

"Yo "
"How are you doing?"
"Everything's perfect, I have an agreement, I have scheduled general elections, as I want and we will go out properly"
"Oh yeah nice, but if you have an agreement with , no deal with me"

"How could you say that, you gave me your word ... a trade deal that would surpass all that could offer me"
"There is nothing written"
"You said Brexit was the best opportunity ever"
"I never said who would be the payee!"

"But ..."
"Oh ! You thought I'd care about you ?"
"But, our special relationship?"
"I have no friends, I only have debtors and creditors, the ones I got by the balls and the ones I'm going to destroy, Which one do you think you are ?"

"I sacrificed everything, I spit in 's face "
"Your choice, not mine, you were free"
"But no-deal is a greater handicap for , and it's better for me, she tries to have a voice in this world and I can't stand woman with opinion"
"I ..."
"See ya, got a campaign."

"I hear grumbling."
"It's who disguises himself for Halloween as a pirate"
"Well, change from his homicidal delusions."
"Yeah, who helps him with finishes"
"? Helping?"
"Yes, he brought back a hook, a sword, a cannon"
"It's ... considerate"

"You look worried"
"Call it precognition"
"Is it okay if just got on a boat with wishing him godspeed ?"
"Oh the old bastard, I knew it. ALARM! is escaping!"
"My little chainsaw and I are about to have tea with Mr. BoJo, that's all"

"Fuuuu, can you hear that silence?"
"You bet, since October 31, nothing, nothing about Brexit, nothing form Bor ..."
"Wopopop, we do not pronounce his name"
"Yes, all right, he's a pain in the arse, but it's not a reason for ..."
shows
"Oh fuck, sorry"

"Any improvement?"
"Tough, last time, we caught him right in front of Downing Street, disguised as Theresa May"
"Oh ..."
"The minigun betrayed him anyway"
"Can we do something?"
"We have forbidden from approaching him, so getting better"

"" yelled at and threatened him to appoint Melenchon as commissioner for happiness among the peoples of Europe "
"Outch, going far"
"No choice, things get out of hand, finally, asked for pardon and sent a doll to to be forgiven"

"A doll?"
"Strange gift"
"It really calms , look, he's playing quietly with it, singing"
"Ota se! Ota se!"
"Wait a minute, what's in his hand?"
"Knitting needles, it seems knitting has a relaxing effect"

"He's stabbing the doll with the needles, isn't it ?"
"Wait, let me see ... but ... the doll look like BoJo !?"
"Oh motherfucker! He sent a voodoo doll !! I'm going to kill him, you bastard!!!!"
"HihiHIHIÂÂÂRRRRR"

"I DO not want to go !!!"
"No choice, it's the rules, it's the rotating presidency of the Council of the EU, six months each of us, and I think is a bit worn out"
"But it was supposed to be over by October 31st !!"
"It annoys me as much as you, believe me!"

"I'm gong to fine you for not appointing a commissioner"
"WHAT?"
"Yeah, infringement procedure after your ass, when we vote the last delay, I told you to appoint one"
"I did not ask for delay!"
"Sorry?"
"No, you forced me take the report"

"That's product tying, it's your fault!"
"I ..."
"No, no, no, you go back to sleep, stab your doll, do something, we don't need more nonsense!"
"HihiHIHIÂÂÂRRRRR"
"Anyway, you say that everything is my fault since 1973, nothing changes ... then this commissioner?"

"I'm going to appoint Jeremy Corbyn!"
"Beg your pardon, Jeremy Corbyn, Labor leader ?"
"Yes, he's against and for brexit, noone understand what he is saying, he will be perfect!"
"Ah ... I'm surprised and when did he accept ?"
"What, I need him to be agree ?"

"Hey, hey, me, I have a commissioner!"
"Let me guess, this one, he's going to jail, he's assaulted children, wait, it's Patrick Balkany, right?"
"Buuuuuuut ... no, it's Thierry Breton"
"Fuck, you found a normal one, can't believe you succeed"

"I've decided to make my hunxit"
"Your what?"
"Same shit as "
"Wait a sec, I don't understand everything, you're leaving ?"
"Yes"
"And there is a reason?"
"Yes, you are too gay!"
"WTF ??"
"You keep electing girls in dress with beards, I'm confused"

" ? Did Ursula Von Der Leien grow a beard ? "
"Not the last time I looked, she wears dress, yeah, but, it's that forbids women from wearing pants"
"Oh, please, I repealed that shitty law a few years ago"

"It does not help in any way, did you activate section 50?"
"No, why?"
"You said you wanted to leave."
"Ah, you're not in charge of Eurovision?"
"Are you sure we can't exclude a country whose leaders are overly too stupid?"

"If there is something that I will not regret, it's these moralists of judges of the ECHR."
"No more convictions for inhuman treatment, for torture, for wrongful imprisonment, I am free fucking"
"You bring end to the dictates of the Strasbourg judges!"

"Aren't we telling him that has nothing to do with the ECHR and the Strasbourg judges?"
"Why, he looks so happy!"
"And I can't wait to see his face when he's going to be sentenced again after brexit, soo sweet"
"Please, you're making me horny."
"HihiHIHIÂÂÂRRRR"

⚑ "Let's evaluate our latest terrorist operation in "
⚑ "We're not supposed to do a ceremony, call our deity bawling prayers?"
⚑ "Why are you seeing a camera?"
⚑"Well ... no"
⚑ "So, why are you messing with us?"

⚑ "Well, dunno, but we stick Allah everywhere so I thought ..."
⚑ "Are you retarded? In our branch, religion is a product, not a believing, it's not up to us to believe, it's the job of those morons we are sending to die for our sole enrichment"

⚑ "Not even a little something?"
⚑ "Listen, we are in the business of terrorism, we do not mix feelings with the cash, so you stop bothering us with your book"
⚑ "The Koran!"
⚑ "What?"
⚑ "It's not the book, it's the Koran, show some respect at least"

⚑ "It's getting on my nerves, will you stop?"
⚑ "But ..."
⚑ "Have you read it?"
⚑ "Eeerrr ... no?"
Bah "So what !!!! Come on, we have a job, so, assessment of our last operation on the unfaithful English segment , by our marketing director, Atlantic region"

⚑ "We make an operation we already did, which worked well in the past, with knives and a false belt of explosives"
⚑ "Yeah, I remember, it made their lifes miserable?"
⚑ "Well ..."
⚑ "What?"
⚑ "It's a bit embarrassing ... they stopped him, he did not go far"

⚑ "It's not a big deal, we do not expect to get back those morons home. The cops took it down, that's good for the staff, martyr of faith, all that shit"
⚑ "Well ..."
⚑ "WHAT ?!
⚑ "Civilians who got him, not the cops"

⚑ "With firearms, even better, like , the more guns, the merrier"
⚑ "Well ..."
⚑ "SPIT IT ! Or you're gonna regret not being religious"
⚑ "Well they stopped him with a fire extinguisher and a narwhal horn!"
⚑ "..."
⚑ "Do you see the mess?"

⚑ "Everyone is gonna laugh at us, months of preparation and this piece of shit is pinned by an amateur firefighter and a fisherman with a fish tooth ... But what is this shitty country, what are these people. Won't they kneel ?"
"Punk is not dead"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah ..."
"Even line 13 of the Paris metro is faster than Brexit"
"Even is faster than that!"
"Hey, I heard that!"
"Even we manage to make a government faster"
"Even we build bridges better than brexit."

"Will you please SHUT UP ! I said I will do it, there's no need to remind me every 6 months!"
"You know, I still have to thank you!"
"Duh?"
"You've done more for the unity of the Union than any advertising campaigns in the past 50 years, really thank you"
"'Hate U"

"Hey, psst , hey"
"What, what do you want ? Making fun of me, as usual ?"
"No, I need a service"
"Oh ???"
"It seems that you have at home a great guy who makes public opinion swallowing quite a few bitter pills, Cumin or something like that."

"Cumin ?? You mean Cummings !! ??
"Yes, that's it, there was a documentary on BBC, but I didn't understand everything, is he really good?"
"This guy is awesome, he made all my underlings believe that if they voted for leave, we would pour the EU contribution in the NHS"

"The NHS?
"Social Security, it runs so well that sometimes it would be better to be treated by a veterinarian"
"And how many abstainers did he bring back like that?"
"One million"
"Ah put ...."
"See ?!"

"How did he do that? because that was all bullshit that story of £ 350 million a week in the NHS."
"You just need to remember, the bigger it is, the more it goes"
"What if the others prove that it is false?
"You say they are part of the system"

"Just that?"
"It's magic, look, back home, you have a party that says as much nonsense as the UKIP here."
"You will have to specify, it suits with my whole political class"
"Those who don't like the not white"
"Ah yeah, the Rassemblement National"

"They have been accused of having embezzled European funds and French public funds and a whole lot of other things, what did they say as a defense?"
"That it is political and the system wants to silence them ... oh shit !"
"See what I mean?"

"It's magic, it works for everything, you hired your wife at the expense of the State? It's the system! Did you shake roughly the cops during a search? It's the system! You have raped your collaborators? It's the system! "
"If you knew what people are ready to believe!"

"And, could you lend it to me?"
"As you wish, it comes with a free communication pack, what do you prefer: the state lies to you or divide to rule?"
"Both"
"This is for?"
"A small pension reform to pass, nothing serious"

"Damn it, YES! YES!"
"Finally, not too early"
"We will be able to do something other than taking care of "
"Even the markets are happy and the pound is rising"
"Come on, champagne!"
"Wait, he is coming ! Hide everything!"

"So, loosers ? You all shut your mouths now?"
"Ah yeah, well done"
"We are sad that you are leaving"
"Well too late, bye loosers"
"Good ? Did he leave?"
"Yeah!"
"BRING ME THE BITCHES AND THE COKE! It's going to be the feast of the century."

"It's done?"
"Yeah, an absolute majority, I fucked the DUP and Labor properly. At the same time, I was campaigning against Corbyn"
"And ?"
"DE-VAS-TA-TED they were"
"Come on !! on the bench, stark naked!"
"Open bar guys!"
"Yeah, devastated"

"You don't seem ok, "
"Yeah, I'm in deep shit"
"Why, because of Brexit?"
"Hell yeah, you can't imagine!"
"Please, it's not going to be the apocalypse, it's about your money?"
"No, don't care about that, it goes up, it goes down, no ..."

"Relationship with ?"
"I've been pissing on it since 1973, I make him cuckold as soon and as much as I can, it can only go towards the best"
"Ah, I know, are you going to have trouble keeping your promises on the NHS?"

"Not even, it's so complex that people don't try to understand and believe everything I say"
"So you've been lying for years and changing your mind every morning and they don't see that?"
"Yeah, it's magic, we were right to smash public education"

"So, what bothers you?"
"Well, two things"
"First, since 2016 we have only talked about Brexit, Brexit, Brexit and that I manage."
"And?"
"I can't do anything else, can't govern a country, I haven't done it since 2016, I forgot how to"

"It's like cycling, you can't forget and then there are countries that are doing very well without government"
"Fuck you!"
"Yeah, but you wallow a bunch of times before ... nevertheless, not the most serious yet"
"Is there something really serious?"
"Deep shit"

"So ?"
"Well, with the postponement, we had elected european MEPs"
"Yeah and?"
"After Brexit, they will return back"
"I don't understand!"
"I HAVE TO TAKE BACK FARAGE HOME, Bwahahahahahaha"
"Ah yeah ..."

"It's awful ... it's a disgrace"
"What?"
"This departure is monstrous for the English"
"Hey!"
"You see, I don't even have the heart to told them to fuck off, while I love it for real, but what did I do? what can I do to fix it?"

"Do you think he has second thoughts?"
"Wait, there is something, can't be that reasonable"
"I know it divided my underlings..."
"Hey!"
"Silence Slaves!"
"See, got it back"
"Yeah, but it's not the same, I've no longer same juice"

"That's it, he regrets, he voted yesterday for Brexit and bazinga, he regrets now, he understood"
"Wait, , are you really sorry?"
"Can't imagine, I know we've been discussing this for a long time, but when it becomes real, concrete, I ... I hadn't imagined."

"If I could do something to go back on it... I will do it, right away."
"By the Tavelic's Holy Gonads , that's it !!"
"I tell you, there is a scam"
"Everything is fine, it's forgotten, let's continue as before, as if nothing happened"
"What's that nonsense?"

"Well, Brexit, you regret leaving us, right?"
"WHAT ! NEVER! Don't care about your used-to-be virgins' asses!"
"What are you talking about then?
"Abut #Megxit, Harry and Meghan are leaving for , worst thing that has happened to me since 1973, at best"

"But I ..."
"Welcome to my life of the last three years"
"I'm not going to bear that, in any way, can't !, bwaaaaaaa"
"HIHIHIHHIAAARRRRRR"

"Don't you have better things to do than having a damn clock ringing?"
"No, why?"
"Is it going to be like this for 6 months?"
"If we are lucky"

"Well, by the way, how is it going to be?"
"What's wrong McFly ? Chicken !"
"No, I'm far-sighted, it's German, you can't understand"
"Cotcotcotcotcot"
"But are you going to shut up? In fact, on January 31, that retarded is normally outside, but ..."

"But what?"
"You will not get rid of me like that, na-na-na-na"
launches pain ins arse, director's cut
"They have ratified the withdrawal agreement, but after that, EU law will not cease to apply until 1 January.
"2021?"
"Hell yeah!"

"There is a transition period, just to avoid a hard and brutal exit"
"Wait, if I'm not wrong, we will have to negotiate with him before December 31, 2020 to find an agreement?"
"Yeah"
"With this retarded who took 3 and a half years just to decide how coming out?"

"Yeah"
"Nooooooo"
"And you know what? I can ask for an extension ! one to two years more with me!"
"NOOOO!!"
"And what happens if we sign nothing?"
"We apply the WTO rules"
"Sorry ?
"Customs taxes, fishing zones, access to the EU market all that"

"Don't care!"
"Don't you have a big financial center that needs some access to the EU market for your business?"
"Don't care! Brexit means brexit"
"You'll piss us off until the end, right?"
"Until you weep tears of blood!"

"And our 3.5 million nationals, on your soil ? do you remember that they must be able to stay, live with the same rights as your citizens?"
"Don't know, maybe , if I want"
"You promised ! That they would be granted "settled status".

"Yeah, and?"
And you granted them with the statutes "pre settled"
"What does it change?"
"Pre settled have to obtain the stelled statutes after, so risk of not getting it and being expelled"
"It will depends if you are nice to me"
"Blackmailer!"
"No, trader"

"Ah fuck, forgot that I had to pass the Brexit agreement in the redneck parliaments"
"What?"
"Well, my peons, my dodgers, my assholes, all those over whom eternal England reigns without weakening"
"HEY !!"

"Here, I present them to you, the stupid in dresses, the redheaded assholes and ... why are you silent?"
ULSTER "HEY !!"
"Ah, there you are, alcoholic terrorists"
"What were you doing?"
ULSTER "WHAT IS IT! It's been 3 years without working assembly worked, we are rusty"

"Uh, hi!"
"I want to come with you, adopt me, this bastard has been abusing me for centuries, I can't bear it any more, help me"
"Me not, but if I can piss off !"
ULSTER "..."
"Enough underlings, well, there you go, the Brexit agreement, you sign, that's all"

"Uh, we want to read the stuff"
"Why ?"
ULSTER "I don't know, as long as I don't join "
"Ah yes, he is a bit slow"
"This is the last one, we are not sure he's not retarded"
ULSTER "I want to read the agreement"
"You can't read!"

ULSTER "HEY !! Don't call me retarded!!"
"I don't care, I vote against"
"Me too"
ULSTER "AND I CAN READ!"
"Damn ... here we go again"
"No, I have to ask them for opinion, but in reality, I simply don't care"

"You tyrant oppressor!"
"It's good to have such a stable relationship for centuries"
ULSTER "I VOTE AGAINST"
"Yeah, yeah, sweetheart"
"I'm not going to survive"
"You know, usually, I don't endorse alcoholism, but there''s circumstances!"