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why theodore is getting the best head (a thread)
1- before i explain how theodore is getting the best head, first i must explain how alvin is getting HORRIBLE head and simon is getting mediocre head.
2- alvin is receiving the head from his chippette counterpart, brittany, WHO HAS THE BIGGEST TEETH OUT OF HER SISTERS.
3- simon, being the runner-up for receiving the best head, falls through due to well... HIS DICK NOT EVEN BEING IN HER MOUTH
4- based on my harvard approved illustration of the chipmunk’s penis, when lining up jeanettes mouth to simons penis, it’s likely on her forehead, meaning jeanette is eating him out, adam22 style
5- now while i do not find ANYTHING wrong with her eating him out, you might say that due to receiving minimal head, simon should be in 3rd. however, i disagree.
6- would you rather the prissy THOT WITH BIG ASS TEETH blowing you or the kind, booksmart girl with NORMAL TEETH, blow you? now suck on that.
7- now to the main topic. big man theo.
8- theodore is most definitely getting the best head simply due to his body language and his facial expression.
9- theo, unlike his brothers has his head rolled back and his feet FLAT on the floor meaning he is so calm and pleased with the job that eleanor is doing that he has devolved into this form.
10- the succ that he is experiencing must be so powerful.
11- theodore is receiving head from eleanor, the one with the MEDIUM SIZED TEETH and chubbiest cheeks allowing for more cushioning and comfort
FINAL- in conclusion, as a theodorian, i truly believe that theodore is getting the best head. thank you. case closed.
edit: don’t even get me started on his nut bust...
