Wests Tigers - The banter club (a thread)

Dropping tonight

Preface: the banter goes all the way back to 2000, but I'm starting from 2005, because otherwise I'd be writing a novel.

2005 - Win a premiership after playing an unbelievable two months of football. The spine of Brett Hodgson, Benji Marshall, Scott Prince and Robbie Farah combine brilliantly and produce some of the most memorable attacking rugby league in history.

2005 - Tim Sheens (known henceforth as Sheenius) went overdrive in his recruitment in a bid to stay relevant, signing Keith Galloway, Jamaal Lolesi & Michael Crockett along with paying big money for Ryan O'Hara, who somehow played 1 game for NSW.

2006 - The club played just one trial game in Gunnedah against a local country team. Was a great warm-up for the 2006 World Club Challenge, said no-one ever. Sheenius played Daniel Fitzhenry at five-eighth as Benji Marshall was injured and we lost 30-10.

2006 - Benji Marshall busted his shoulder twice & also broke his cheekbone. Brett Hodgson missed most of the season. Scott Prince was homesick & went back to QLD with the Titans. Anthony Laffranchi went too, while John Skandalis & Shane Elford move to England. We finish 11th.

2007 - Sheenius signs John Morris (a hooker) to replace Prince, famously telling fans, "he's going to be our Cooper Cronk". Morris ends up being a serial overlap murderer and one of the worst and most robotic halfbacks to grace an NRL field.

2007 - Another one of Sheenius' star signings was Peter Lewis. Was talked up by the Tigers media department as having goals to play Origin, then quit in the pre-season. Believe it or not, he never played Origin.

2007 - Only needed to beat Newcastle (who were running last and had won just 7 games all year) in the last round to make the finals. Despite being up by 12 points with 8 minutes to go, somehow lost the game 26 - 24 and finished 9th.

2007 - Buoyed by great results over the last two years (not), the club extend Tim Sheens' coaching contract, which was due to expire at the end of the 2008 season, until the end of 2010.

2008 - The club actually releases a press statement saying "we nearly signed All Black Ma'a Nonu. We also nearly made the finals.

2008 - Ryan O'Hara leaves the club after eight first grade games in two years and was later described as one of the worst buys in NRL history. The club was rumoured to be paying him over $400K a season. Also broke his jaw twice in the same year.

2008 - Sheenius comes up with the bright idea of playing no front rowers against the Eels, who had one of the biggest packs in the NRL at the time. Danny Galea & Bronson Harrison start the game as props & we lose 44 - 6. Feleti Mateo also makes his usual 39 offloads against us.

2009 - The club finishes 9th. Again. Taniela Tuiaki gets injured against Parramatta in a must-win game (which of course we lose) and is forced to retire after three operations on his ankle.

2009 - Sheenius signs Jason Cayless on a two-year contract starting from 2010.

2010 - Cayless plays the first three games of the season from the bench, but then gets injured and doesn't play again.

2010 - The club manages to sign Lote Tuqiri on a 3 year deal. It's the start of a positive period, and we make the semi finals two years in a row. Tuqiri scores a try with his first touch of the ball & performs fantastically well, even returning to play for Australia.

2010 - We now have three first grade coaches on the roster - Sheens, Royce Simmons & Steve Folkes. The only thing they have in common is that they won wooden spoons at their respective clubs before coming to us. Folkes does seem to improve our defence, however, and we finish 4th.

2010 - We make the finals for just the second time in 11 years, but lose a scrum against the fucking feed with 30 seconds left in a major semi-final against the Roosters. To top it off, Braith Anasta then kicks a field goal from 40 metres out, close to the sideline.

2010 - We heartbreakingly lose in extra time after Liam Fulton throws an intercept pass to Shaun Kenny-Dowall, who runs the length of the field and scores in the corner.

2010 - After years of enduring John Morris, fans celebrate as we finally think we have a promising young halfback (Robert Lui) who was our best player in the semi finals. He celebrates by drinking a case of cruisers and allegedly bashing his partner.

2011 - Jason Cayless announces his retirement before the start of the 2011 season due to injury. He played three games of first grade.

2011 - In the week leading up to the start of the season, Benji Marshall was investigated for an alleged assault. This incident occurred just days after Marshall was announced as the face of rugby league for 2011.

2011 - Penrith offer Sheenius a massive deal to coach the club. However, the club panics and extends his coaching contract again, this time until the end of 2014.

2011 - Simon Dwyer, one of the most promising players at the club, suffers a brachial plexus injury. Despite having nerve redirection, Dwyer never regains functionality in his right arm and is forced to retire.

2011 - Tuqiri only plays 9 games due to a broken arm, a quad strain and an ankle injury.

2011: Charges against Robert Lui from 2010 get dropped and he continues his fine form with us. When we bow out in the semi finals for the second year running, he celebrates by drinking a case of cruisers and allegedly bashing his partner (again). This time he is sacked.

2011 - The Dragons announce the signing of Tim Moltzen on a 3-year contract. Tigers CEO Stephen Humphreys claims the club had not yet officially released Moltzen from the last year of his contract, labelling the Dragons, "arrogant and disrespectful."

2011 - Following the sacking of Lui, Moltzen conveniently backflips on the Dragons deal and remains with the Tigers, much to the delight of Dragons fans.

2011 - We make the finals for just the third time in 12 years, but lose in the semi's against eventual grand finalists New Zealand Warriors.

2011 - The club releases Andrew Fifita, Bryce Gibbs & Chris Heighington to accommodate major signing Adam Blair for a reported $500K/yr over 3 years. Liam Fulton is given permission to negotiate with other clubs but remains. Sheenius retains front-rower Matt Groat ahead of Fifita

2012 - Groat rewards Sheenius with a fabulous career in black, white and gold, playing a total of 17 games for the club. Groat was so good for the Tigers, he signed with the Dragons for 2013, but did not play a single game of first grade ever again.

2012 - The club is somehow over the salary cap a week before round 1, probably because they are reportedly still paying Gibbs & Heighington to play for Cronulla. To ease cap pressure, they release backup fullback Mitch Brown.

2012 - 20 minutes into round 1 at Leichhardt Oval, James Tedesco does his ACL and misses the entire season. Fans are then subjected to Tim Moltzen at fullback.

2012 - The sacking of Lui sees Moltzen move to halfback. Sheenius says: "With Moltzen and Marshall, we'll have the fastest halves combination in the game. No other team is going to have more speed over 80 metres than that pair." Moltzen lasts just 3 games at halfback.

2012 - Barely a year after re-signing Sheens for a second time, the club announces he would not coach the team in the 2013 season. As they can't afford to pay out his contract, they offer him other roles, which he politely declines. His last parting gift is signing Braith Anasta.

2012 - The club hires Mick Potter on a two year deal and had to continue to pay Sheens' salary (reportedtly around $450K/yr) until the end of June 2013. The club goes on a 7 game losing streak from Round 4 to Round 10.

2013 - Tuqiri's broken arm doesn't heal correctly, so he has plates inserted. He only plays 4 games for the season, making it a total of 11 games in 2 years. The club doesn't renew his contract. He then signs with Souths, plays the majority of 2014 and wins a premiership.

2013 - Adam Blair is described as one of the worst ever NRL signings in the modern era. Apart from paying ridiculous money for Blair, the Tigers salary cap is an absolute mess as the club is still paying Gibbs and Heighington from their previous deals.

2013 - Benji Marshall leaves the club at the end of the season, despite still being under contract for another two years. Marshall claimed a handshake deal wasn’t honoured for a contract extension, then posed in an Auckland Blues jersey while still playing for the club.

2013 - Braith Anasta, initially signed by Sheenius to play halfback, is moved to the backrow by Potter. He then states that Sheens was the only reason he came to the club. Anasta quickly becomes one of the most hated Tigers players by the clubs fanbase.

2014 - Gordon Tallis claims on radio that captain Robbie Farah told him privately that Mick Potter "can't coach". Farah angrily denies the claims.

2014 - Gun fullback James Tedesco announced he is signing with the Raiders, only to renege on the deal before the June 30 deadline and remain with the Tigers. Farah is revealed as having influence in his decision to stay.

2014 - Marika Koroibete is released and joins Melbourne Storm. Koroibete scored 12 tries in 16 first grade games for the Tigers but struggled to get game time. At the time of release, he led the NSW Cup tryscoring list with 15 tries.

2014 - Following reports of miscommunication between him and the playing group, Potter is sacked after an "internal review" lead by Brian Smith. The club is now reportedly paying two former coaches in Sheens & Potter, and a handful of players that are now playing for other clubs.

2014 - Speaking of Sheens, the club stops paying him, so he launches legal action in the NSW Supreme Court. He claims his sacking in 2012 damaged his reputation and meant he wasn't able to find work at another NRL club since.

2014 - Braith Anasta announces he is retiring at the end of the season, much to the joy of the fanbase. Three years later, he smashes the club in an interview saying the facilities are awful, the club is a "debacle" and that there was even a lack of Gatorade available to players.

2015 - The club appoints Jason Taylor, a first grade coach who once got king hit by one of his players on Mad Monday. He was described as "key to building a new culture and setting the foundations for a successful future at Wests Tigers" by CEO Grant Mayer.

2015 - Curtis Sironen is photographed in bed with a naked woman, and accused of allegedly cheating on his girlfriend. The photo was published on Twitter and the club was tagged in the Tweet.

2015 - Jason Taylor ends his first season winning just 8 games and finishing equal last. Only Newcastle's for and against saves the club winning the wooden spoon for the first time in history.

2016 - Taylor relegates Farah to reserve grade, claiming the team plays better without him. Farah ends up signing with Souths & spends his last game on the Leichhardt Oval scoreboard sinking tinnies. The club reportedly still pays Farah 750K to play for the Rabbitohs in 2017.

2016 - The club wins 9 out of 15 games towards the back end of the season and sets up one last shot at a finals finish against the Raiders in Round 26. They get smashed 52 - 10 at Leichhardt Oval after being down 30-4 at halftime.

2017 - CEO Justin Pascoe tells young gun fullback Ryan Papenhuyzen that we are resigning James Tedesco. Papenhuyzen signs with Melbourne Storm, and weeks later Tedesco signs with the Roosters. He doesn't backflip this time.

2017 - Matt Ballin announces his immediate retirement due to chronic injuries, having made only one first grade appearance for the club.

2017 - Tim Simona is found betting on NRL games and is officially de-registered by the NRL. The disgraced centre then reveals to the media that he'd been snorting cocaine with teammates during Mad Monday celebrations in 2016.

2017 - Jason Taylor is sacked after just three games (1 win, 2 losses). It is understood the club is now paying about $1.2 million for players and coaches who are no longer there: around $750K to Farah, around $200K for Curtis Sironen and now $250K for Taylor.

2017 - Taylor's parting gift is signing Chris McQueen for a reported $450K per season deal, despite him having a known, major back/neck problem.

2017 - The club signs Ivan Cleary as head coach on a three year deal.

2017 - Four of the clubs best/most promising players - Aaron Tedesco, Aaron Woods, Mitch Moses and Luke Brooks - are all off contract at the end of the season, perfect planning and foresight by Tigers management.

2017 - Cleary famously declares that he only wants players "on the bus". The club tables offers to Tedesco, Woods and Moses but they all jump off the bus. Brooks is re-signed.

2017 - Cleary leads the club to a 14th placed finish, winning just 7 games all season, but there's cause for optimism as the salary cap situation improves.

2018 - Finally, with room in the salary cap after years of paying former players and coaches, Cleary goes on a spending spree, signing Josh Reynolds, Ben Matulino and Russell Packer on big money deals.

2018 - Benji Marshall returns to the club. Cleary throws Robbie Farah a lifeline in a mid-season transfer. Moses Mbye is also signed on a big money, mid-season deal. Marshall ends up cementing a five-eighth spot as $800K signing Josh Reynolds manages just 5 games due to injuries.

2018 - Cleary's new signings guide the club to 9th, narrowly missing out on a finals spot. Cleary then stays true to his "on the bus" mantra & requests a release to re-join Penrith. After initially stating the club would not release him, CEO Justin Pascoe eventually caves.

2018 - Speaking of Pascoe, the CEO is de-registered and the club fined $750K for an agreement signed with Farah in 2016 to become a club ambassador when he retires. The amount of Farah's ambassador deal – $639K – is to be included in the 2019 cap as it was not declared to the NRL

2018 - The club was rumoured to be in talks with Wayne Bennett, but sign Michael Maguire as head coach on a three year deal.

2018 - The clubs salary cap is once again a mess, this time due to big money deals for McQueen, and Cleary's star signings Reynolds and Packer.

2019 - Packer, reportedly on a deal worth over $650K a season, falls out with Maguire and only plays 5 games. Packer is on a long term contract that runs to the end of 2021.

2019 - Reynolds is given permission to negotiate with other clubs for 2020 and beyond as he is not in Maguire's plans. The 30-year-old manages just 12 NRL appearances in 18 months since signing with the Tigers on a 4 year deal (by Cleary). His contract runs until the end of 2021.

2019 - Maguire performs reasonably well despite not having his own squad and dealing with the mess left behind by Cleary. He gets the club within one game of making the semi-finals for the first time in 8 years

2019 - In front of a sell-out crowd at Leichhardt, the club loses the last game of the season to Cronulla and even let Paul Gallen kick a field goal. They finish 9th & have the longest drought without a finals appearance (8 years). The club has finished 9th six times since 2004.

2019 - Beau Ryan is made a life member of the club at the end of season awards function. Players that aren't life members include Scott Prince and Gareth Ellis.

The end.

In summary, while there's been horrible mismanagement and poor decisions from the top down, I also believe there's been an incredible amount of bad luck and misfortune over the year.

Hopeful Maguire can turn the club around, because if he can't then...

How could I forget, 2016 - The club & Jason Taylor think it's a good idea signing Jamal Idris after he spent 18 months away from rugby league touring the world. He plays 5 games, ruptures his ACL, then retires.

2020 - The club comes up against the Gold Coast Titans, who had not won a single game in 12 months. They lose, of course.

2020 - We lose to the Warriors after leading 8-0 early, despite them needing to loan players from other clubs to actually field a team due to COVID-19. The most exciting part of the performance was Michael Maguire kicking over a chair during his half time speech.

2021 - The club honours legend Tommy Raudonikis in a way only they can - by having four tries put on them in the first half by the Cowboys, who hadn't won a game all season. They make a game of it in the second half, but still lose, of course.

In his post match press conference, Michael Maguire says "it's not what Wests Tigers are about".

He obviously hasn't caught up on this thread.

2021 - It's another big occasion as the club plays on Anzac Day for the first time in 15 years. A big occasion means a big Wests Tigers performance and they respond the only way they know how - by conceding 40 points to Manly after scoring the first try of the game.