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Bad Fanfic with Namjin
SJ: i am Jin and this is my service top Namjoon. we are married and drink Malbecs.
NJ: i am the top
SJ: yes i told them sweetie
SJ: i am Jin and this is my service top Namjoon. we are married and drink Malbecs.
NJ: i am the top
SJ: yes i told them sweetie
Bad Fanfic With Yoonmin
YG, in a torn suit with five lit cigarettes in his mouth: get in my lap
JM, in his lap with literal cat ears wearing a pink French maid outfit and nibbling on the cigarettes: yes Daddy
YG: ur a little freak huh, kiddo? meow for me
JM: meow
YG: neat
YG, in a torn suit with five lit cigarettes in his mouth: get in my lap
JM, in his lap with literal cat ears wearing a pink French maid outfit and nibbling on the cigarettes: yes Daddy
YG: ur a little freak huh, kiddo? meow for me
JM: meow
YG: neat
Bad Fanfic with SOPE
YG: i am very grumpy
HS: the cure for that is my dick
YG: bet
YG: oh
YG: wow that worked
YG: *smiles*
Maknae line: he’s scary!!! Make it stop!!!
YG: i am very grumpy
HS: the cure for that is my dick
YG: bet
YG: oh
YG: wow that worked
YG: *smiles*
Maknae line: he’s scary!!! Make it stop!!!
Bad Fanfic with Poly OT7
JK: it’s hard being an international playboy today
OT6: we noticed you were having a tough time so we have lined up in age order to have sex with you
JK, eyes glistening: u guys get me
JK: i can’t tell you how much this means to me
JK: it’s hard being an international playboy today
OT6: we noticed you were having a tough time so we have lined up in age order to have sex with you
JK, eyes glistening: u guys get me
JK: i can’t tell you how much this means to me
Bad Fanfic with Poly OT7
JM: i am crying
JM: and my sweater is comically large
OT6: we think sex will fix that
JM: i am still crying
OT6: but it’s a better crying now, right?
JM: huh
JM: I guess it is
JM: i am crying
JM: and my sweater is comically large
OT6: we think sex will fix that
JM: i am still crying
OT6: but it’s a better crying now, right?
JM: huh
JM: I guess it is
Bad Fanfic with Taekook
TH: i am a well-rounded, moral and dynamic character
JK: i am a literal criminal
TH: well this clearly is a bad idea.
TH: i still wanna smash, tho
TH: i am a well-rounded, moral and dynamic character
JK: i am a literal criminal
TH: well this clearly is a bad idea.
TH: i still wanna smash, tho
Bad Fanfic with Jikook
JK: i am a heterosexual
JM: *walks by in slo-mo*
JK: huh
JK: i know right away that I am attracted to you but I will proceed to be a headass for at least 30k
JM: it’s not a problem, my defining trait is putting up with your headassery
JK: i am a heterosexual
JM: *walks by in slo-mo*
JK: huh
JK: i know right away that I am attracted to you but I will proceed to be a headass for at least 30k
JM: it’s not a problem, my defining trait is putting up with your headassery
Bad Fanfic with Jihope
JH: we are roommates
JM: horny roommates
JH: y—what??
JM:
JM:
JM: take off ur pants
JH: we are roommates
JM: horny roommates
JH: y—what??
JM:
JM:
JM: take off ur pants
Bad Fanfic with Minjoon
JM: h—
NJ: i am entirely unbalanced by you and socially inept lacking the basic capacity to interact like a human.
NJ: i am also amazing in bed
NJ: no it doesn’t sound like the author is projecting
JM: h—
NJ: i am entirely unbalanced by you and socially inept lacking the basic capacity to interact like a human.
NJ: i am also amazing in bed
NJ: no it doesn’t sound like the author is projecting
Bad Fanfic with Taekook
JK: i am tortured with a tragic backstory and am not worthy of love
TH: i will now top you to prove that none of that matters
JK: i will probably cry
TH: that’s part of the journey for some reason
JK: i am tortured with a tragic backstory and am not worthy of love
TH: i will now top you to prove that none of that matters
JK: i will probably cry
TH: that’s part of the journey for some reason
Bad Fanfic with Namjin
SJ: I wear nothing but pink and bake in every scene we are together but I am going to top you
NJ: okay wig
SJ: I wear nothing but pink and bake in every scene we are together but I am going to top you
NJ: okay wig
Bad Fanfic with Taegi
YG: i am the baddest mf in the streets
TH: *breathes*
YG: choke me daddy
TH: what
YG: what
YG: i am the baddest mf in the streets
TH: *breathes*
YG: choke me daddy
TH: what
YG: what
Bad Fanfic with Jinmin
SJ: i am wealthy and successful and I want to pay for everything in your life and protect you and deal with your excessive mood swings, random journalism major
JM: what’s in this for you
SJ: neither of us know
SJ: i am wealthy and successful and I want to pay for everything in your life and protect you and deal with your excessive mood swings, random journalism major
JM: what’s in this for you
SJ: neither of us know
Bad Fanfic with Jikook
JM: u are the worst
JK: u are the worst
JM: fine! *storms away*
JK, when he’s out of sight:
JM, when he’s out of sight:
Everyone else: gross
Everyone else: there’s still 70k left
Everyone else: imagine how tired we are
JM: u are the worst
JK: u are the worst
JM: fine! *storms away*
JK, when he’s out of sight:
JM, when he’s out of sight:
Everyone else: gross
Everyone else: there’s still 70k left
Everyone else: imagine how tired we are
Bad Fanfic with Poly OT7
OT7: *orgy in the practice room*
Managers: ew
OT7: *orgy in the practice room*
Managers: ew
Bad Fanfic with 2seok
404 error: pathway does not exist
404 error: pathway does not exist
Bad Fanfic with Paired up OT7
Taekook: *loud gay noises*
Yoonmin: *smol angry gay noises*
Namjin: *elderly lesbian noises*
HS: *disgruntled heterosexual noises*
Taekook: *loud gay noises*
Yoonmin: *smol angry gay noises*
Namjin: *elderly lesbian noises*
HS: *disgruntled heterosexual noises*
Bad Fanfic with AltPaired up OT7
Jikook: *annoying gay noises*
SOPE: *smug gay noises*
Taejin: *feral gay noises*
NJ: *eccentric ace noises*
Jikook: *annoying gay noises*
SOPE: *smug gay noises*
Taejin: *feral gay noises*
NJ: *eccentric ace noises*
Bad Fanfic with Taekook
TH: i am a model with substance abuse issues and deep artistic ennui
JK: i am but a humble barista who can teach you how to appreciate the little things with my latte art and penis
TH:
TH: i don’t drink coffee
TH: i am a model with substance abuse issues and deep artistic ennui
JK: i am but a humble barista who can teach you how to appreciate the little things with my latte art and penis
TH:
TH: i don’t drink coffee
Bad Fanfic with any Jimin ship
JM: i am a stripper
Literally anyone: listen you’re better than this—let me save you because I’m not a typical sleazy guy.
JM: ...you came to the club and bought this dance
Literally anyone: ok so about that
Literally anyone: lemme smash
JM: i am a stripper
Literally anyone: listen you’re better than this—let me save you because I’m not a typical sleazy guy.
JM: ...you came to the club and bought this dance
Literally anyone: ok so about that
Literally anyone: lemme smash
Bad Fanfic with Namkook
NJ: i feel so close to u.
NJ: like u understand me at a molecular level
NJ: how is this possible I just met you
JK, having stalked him for the entirety of high school and college: haha must be destiny
NJ: i feel so close to u.
NJ: like u understand me at a molecular level
NJ: how is this possible I just met you
JK, having stalked him for the entirety of high school and college: haha must be destiny
Bad Fanfic with Vhope
TH, wearing denim dungarees and a necktie with a fish on it, carrying a saxophone made entirely of pasta: listen. i am a Serious Hipster and I need to know that you can hang
HS: im an Aquarius
TH: *foams at the mouth*
TH, wearing denim dungarees and a necktie with a fish on it, carrying a saxophone made entirely of pasta: listen. i am a Serious Hipster and I need to know that you can hang
HS: im an Aquarius
TH: *foams at the mouth*
Bad Fanfic with Namgi
YG: rappers these days ain’t shit
NJ: hey I maybe wrote a verse to go with a beat u produced I found on a floppy disk
NJ: it’s 1997 and we both are wearing nicotine patches
YG: o-oh
YG: *blushes*
YG: begins shrinking until too small to see
YG: rappers these days ain’t shit
NJ: hey I maybe wrote a verse to go with a beat u produced I found on a floppy disk
NJ: it’s 1997 and we both are wearing nicotine patches
YG: o-oh
YG: *blushes*
YG: begins shrinking until too small to see
Bad Fanfic with Yoonkook
JK: *sitting, covered in tattoos*
YG: That is the babiest babie I have ever seen
JM: wot. that is practically a werewolf
YG: scuse me kid
Next day
JK: *sitting in yoon’s lap* *giggling*
JM: eye—
JK: *sitting, covered in tattoos*
YG: That is the babiest babie I have ever seen
JM: wot. that is practically a werewolf
YG: scuse me kid
Next day
JK: *sitting in yoon’s lap* *giggling*
JM: eye—
Bad Fanfic with ABOJikook
JK: I have a big alpha dick
JM: I’m not interested for perfectly valid reasons
JK: wHA T
JK: BUT
JK: it’s bIG
JM: actually u know what u have a point
JK: I have a big alpha dick
JM: I’m not interested for perfectly valid reasons
JK: wHA T
JK: BUT
JK: it’s bIG
JM: actually u know what u have a point
Bad Fanfic with Jinkook
JK: wow it sure is great being popular and wealthy and built as hell basically untoucha—
SJ: ssssssssssuuuuuuuuuuuuup
Jk:—ble
SJ:
JK: who tf r u
SJ:
Later
JK, bent over the couch: this doesn’t mean I like u
SJ: if u talk i can’t finish
JK: wow it sure is great being popular and wealthy and built as hell basically untoucha—
SJ: ssssssssssuuuuuuuuuuuuup
Jk:—ble
SJ:
JK: who tf r u
SJ:
Later
JK, bent over the couch: this doesn’t mean I like u
SJ: if u talk i can’t finish
Bad Fanfic with Yoonjin
SJ: hey I noticed u haven’t eaten anything but mustard for a week so I baked u a quiche
YG, ten cups of coffee deep: oh
YG: *drops to his knees, undoes SJ’s pants*
SJ: wtF
YG: this is how humans repay basic kindness
SJ:
SJ: ok lemme set this quiche down
SJ: hey I noticed u haven’t eaten anything but mustard for a week so I baked u a quiche
YG, ten cups of coffee deep: oh
YG: *drops to his knees, undoes SJ’s pants*
SJ: wtF
YG: this is how humans repay basic kindness
SJ:
SJ: ok lemme set this quiche down
Bad Fanfic with Vmon
TH, giggling: we met online
NJ: we met online
TH: i swore i could make his life magical
NJ: i thought it was banter
TH: so we’ve been stargazing at midnight, we drink schnapps with the sunrise and count frogs at dusk
NJ: i haven’t slept in months
NJ: help
TH, giggling: we met online
NJ: we met online
TH: i swore i could make his life magical
NJ: i thought it was banter
TH: so we’ve been stargazing at midnight, we drink schnapps with the sunrise and count frogs at dusk
NJ: i haven’t slept in months
NJ: help
Bad Fanfic with Hopekook
HS: *very clumsy*
JK, saving him from traffic: woah be careful little guy
Later
JK: i can’t wait to have u inside me
HS: wait but aren’t u a t—
JK: no i thought u—
HS:
JK:
HS:
JK: welp
JK: how about we dry-hump while watching HSM
HS:yeah alright
HS: *very clumsy*
JK, saving him from traffic: woah be careful little guy
Later
JK: i can’t wait to have u inside me
HS: wait but aren’t u a t—
JK: no i thought u—
HS:
JK:
HS:
JK: welp
JK: how about we dry-hump while watching HSM
HS:yeah alright
Bad Fanfic with Taejin:
SJ: can i get the...noodles
TH, eyebrow quirked: yeah? you want them? gonna suck down these noodles?
SJ, loosening his tie: yeah, put those slippery noodles in my mouth
TH, licking his lips: careful, they’re...hot
SJ: so hot
OT5: i am uncomfortable
SJ: can i get the...noodles
TH, eyebrow quirked: yeah? you want them? gonna suck down these noodles?
SJ, loosening his tie: yeah, put those slippery noodles in my mouth
TH, licking his lips: careful, they’re...hot
SJ: so hot
OT5: i am uncomfortable
