As a chronically ill & disabled person, when I say I can't do something, it doesn't necessarily mean that I am NEVER able to do the task; it can mean I can't do it at a specific time due to certain symptoms or that if I did do the task I would face hard consequences afterward.

There are so many variables too.

It can also be about the endurance the task demands.

I can walk from one end of small house to the other, I CANNOT get from one end of a block to the other without a mobility aid.

Steps vs. stairs, standing for a moment vs. for a few minutes.

Sometimes I CAN do something but it HURTS to do it.

I think it was Ty who made the example about how it hurts to handle boiling temperatures bare handed but there are circumstances (ie kitchen) where we have to.

Doing it once is a big effort, can't ask them to do it repeatedly!

Then ofc there's being preventative of harm to ourselves.

If we can be cautious of how any given task will impact our symptoms, pain levels, energy levels, etc., and we want to be as stable as we can for as long as we can, we make the call.

We CAN'T because its self care.