I’ve noticed that when men are faithful they think they don’t have to contribute anything else in the relationship and must be applauded for not cheating.

Being faithful is the bare minimum, there’s is still so much more work to be done to make your relationship a success. https://twitter.com/vuyomse/status/1135214951528837120

I used to be guilty of that. Ndabona uba we won’t even make it past year 1 if I continue in that way and changed my ways accordingly. Relationships require work in every moment of every day, being faithful to your partner is just the start.

So a lot of people don’t seem to get this;

After 5 years I’m still learning to say “Baba you’ve hurt me and I don’t want to talk about it now, give me a few hours to myself” instead of getting cold, withdrawing affection and being silent. It’s a constant learning curve.

Honesty, Financial honesty, communication, being present, thoughtful, considerate and kind.

These virtues are not talents. Just because you were kind and thoughtful yesterday doesn’t mean today you don’t have to be. It’s an everyday ongoing process that goes on forever.

AND MOST IMPORTANTLY, ALWAYS WATCH YOUR WORDS. You cannot take back something hurtful you have said to your partner.

Never be too proud to say “I’m sorry, abc was wrong in this and that way and I won’t do it again bc it hurts you” (It will never come naturally but work at it.)