Today is 3 years since we lost dad. Recently a few friends have also lost parents, so I’ve been thinking about what it all means. There’s no one way to deal with it, but there are some things I’ve come to learn.

1) It never ever leaves you. But it does become more manageable.

2) It’s a brutal reminder of what does and doesn’t matter in life. Since dad died I’ve made sure I don’t miss friend and family weddings or birthdays. I’ve taken time off when I’ve needed it. Work matters but not at the cost of living life.

3) I’ve learnt that it’s ok to be who we are. Warts and all. That it’s ok to have flaws or to be different. Because life really is too short to worry about a lot of the things we obsess about. I’ve been more forgiving of others, but crucially myself too.

4) I’ve realised that we should always seize the random opportunity or chance we get. Because, it’s better to try stuff than regret stuff. I used to put off those trips, goals or bucket list adventures. But now if I can, I just do it. (Here’s mum + I at the Grand Canyon last yr)

5) But most of all, I’ve learnt that nothing really matters unless we cherish those who care for us. Never take anyone for granted. As we sat around dad’s bed watching him die on that March morning three years ago, there was so much love. What better way to go. Miss you Papa.