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I don’t want a relationship with someone who chooses me purley based on their feelings instead of a combination of feelings, logic and practicality. I want an easy life and will not endure hardship or inconvenience just because I love you. Neither should you.
I want to be able look at you and think “it makes complete sense to be with you” on top of what I feel for you. Otherwise it’s time wasting.
I also want love without attachment. You need to have an existence beyond our relationship and love me because it’s something you choose to do. I don’t want to be suffocated with a love that’s founded on fear of losing me - like everything in life, I am replaceable. So are you.
If we can’t be extensions of who are as a unit then there’s no need to get involved with me - I don’t want to be needed. I’ll support you with whatever but I don’t want to be your principal source of peace and happiness. Do your own emotional labour and dirty work.
Love is possible where you’re not needed. Love is possible with boundaries. I don’t need to lose my mind to be in love with you. It’s just ethics.
Having said this, there’s a difference between dependency and someone who simply chooses to confide in you and keep the communication stable. A person wanting to talk doesn’t mean they’re needy. You need to read those lines carefully.
Remember, being self sufficient doesn’t mean you get leeway to be an inconsiderate fuck that doesn’t even pay attention to their partner. If you lack empathy and compassion then the point I’m getting across here is not for you. Be kind. Otherwise you’re just as useless.
