You want to know what life is like married to a science teacher? Tonight I split a bottle of champagne with him and he is now drunk-ranting about bad teaching practices. It is hilarious.

Exhibit B of life with a biologist: random science experiments around the house. ALWAYS. This week I walked into my living to see these. He's growing crystals. With what, I don't know. The blood of his enemies? At least it's not dead animals in jars (oh yes...that happened too).

Then there are the ENDLESS pea experiments in my sun room. I APPARENTLY MARRIED GREGOR MENDEL.

Then there is the unending disappearance of stuff. Just this week:

Him: (digging through the Tupperware and pulling out the small ones)
Me: I'm making another generous donation to the science program, aren't I?
Him: Yup.
Me:

So many of our tools would disappear during robotics season that I BOUGHT MY OWN PINK TOOL SET and forbade him to take them.

So far only two tools are missing. It's a vast improvement.

Some missing items I can't get mad at him about. For instance, he took my bread maker. When he heard how many of his kids were going hungry, he started making fresh bread for all his classes. Who could fault him for that?

He brought it back tonight, BTW. After 2 years.

I love this man to pieces. The stories I could tell though. OMG My kitchen is half lab most of the time.

Like when he needed to extract liver cells and packed my fridge full of liver...then used my blender to break it all down. My kitchen was filled with liver smoothies.

Or when he had to make chicken fetal specimens. The jars lined my dining room for two weeks as he pickled them.

Don't get me started on the fertilized egg that went bad after sitting in a hot incubator for many days.

(I had to leave the house while he cleaned it up.)

This is what makes him a great teacher, though. He takes his work home with him. We talk about our students daily. It is this kind of dedication that won him a huge teaching award last year.

The man's default drunk setting is going off on bad teaching for crying out loud.

I love the guy. He's amazing. Even if I never know what the hell I might be walking into when I get home at the end of the day.

Like a dead cat in my fridge for dissection Tuesday.

So to his students: YOU'RE WELCOME.

/end

FOOTNOTE: One of my FAVORITE pics of him was of him working in the kitchen. I asked him to put a chicken in the oven for dinner, but instead he got curious, pulled out one if his zoology anatomy books, opened it up to avian muscular systems, & was mid-dissection when I got home.

Another exhibit: we actually have a lab bench in our basement. The hubby saw it at the university yard sale and HAD to have it. I said okay as long as I didn't have to move it.

He got a couple of friends to move it & help make his dream of a scientist lair "man cave" a reality.

And yes, that is a homebrew kit under there. His model organism as a grad student lab was yeast, so yeah...it had to happen.

I swiped some of his publications one year and made him a Yeastopoly game as his xmas present.

#geeklove