Today, after 2.5 years of chemo and follow-up, my husband has had his last treatment. During this period I have been under the mental health services. I want to write a thread on the stark differences in care we have both received.

1. I have never been asked to take responsibility for his wellbeing and life, while he has repeatedly been made to be responsible for my life during my suicidal periods.

2. The staff at the oncology ward in York very much took care of me as well as D., recognising that cancer is difficult for all involved. D. was never even asked how he is by mh services and, as said before has been often asked to do their job.

3. He has always been believed, and his symptoms treated with seriousness even when they turned out to be nothing. The deafult approach to me is usually that I’m overreacting.

4. He has never been made to feel like he was a financial burden on the NHS despite having had treatment for over 2 yeas. I am being discharged soon because, among other things, the NHS can’t afford me anymore.

5. If he has concerns about his health all he has to do is phone his ward and he will be seen by his consultant. So far if I wanted to access my psychiatrist I had to get to a point of severe distress (psychosis).

I don’t want to make it seem like mh services are all bad. I have had received very good care from my psychiatrist and have been stable as a result. These differences in care stem, to a large extent from huge differences in funding of cancer and mh services.

That’s truly awful