The following is 100% true.

My childhood room has a little old side attic that I used to put my toys in (now it's just full of old attic stuff). Late at night I would hear monster noises of things creeping and calling around in it and my mom, naturally, would say "no you don't."

As in "go back to bed there are no monsters." But when I got older it would still happen and I figured oh, it's like raccoons or some shit, but because I'm not a victim in a horror movie, there's no way I was investigating that myself.

So I think I finally convinced my mom to hire a pest person or something, but they found nothing. And besides, it would only happen some nights not every night, etc. So I just went on, figuring whatever animal in there would die or something.

Then years later I came back to visit and I HEARD IT AGAIN like, "holy shit. Whatever it is in still in there." I waited til morning, went in and saw no signs than an animal had been in there whatsoever. I couldn't even find where one would get in.

So this happens sometimes when I visit. And only when the lights are off in my bedroom... And it's happening... right now.

IM SCARED I DONT WANT TO GO IN WHAT DO I DO.

And yes: I'm waiting til it makes the noise again so I can record it.

Update: Haven't heard anything. This is the problem, it always plays into that horror movie logic where I try to document and then NOTHING. Which means IT IS MOST DEFINITELY A HORROR ENTITY THAT IS MESSING WITH ME.

Still no thing

For those who doubt, here is the TOTALLY NOT CREEPY culprit closet...

Equally creepy? The skylight that USED TO BE THERE and got badly filled in...

To set precedence with OLD HOUSE SHIT, one time I was playing around in the basement with my friend elliot and we moved a wooden plank and there was just a DOOR THERE. Being kids, he dared me. I opened it... we found a secret prohibition era liquor hiding spot!

FOLKS WE HAVE MOVEMENT

I swear to f-in god, the second I hit record it died down, can you hear it at the beginning? My heart is beating a million beats per second

I'm gonna turn off the lights and see if that gets more movement...

OKAY MORE MOVEMENT. It was too quick to record. There's a bunch of plastic bags with some old clothes and toys in there. Imagine the sound of something crawling on top of them. I swear I heard a full "step" ...

Soooooo I've been lying in the dark for a half hour, barely breathing, frozen solid... maybe I need to rethink this.

Ok it's 3am so I'm gonna try to sleep somehow. I have my phone ready to try and recording if the noise happens... But tomorrow morning, under the sunlight of a benevolent god, I will venture in...

OK I JUST CAUGHT THE SOUND AMD RECORDED, BUT ALL I HEAR IS AMBIENT NOISE... IS THIS A TELL-TALE HEART THING!?!!? AM I INSANE? WTF

hi im still up why did i think i would sleep tonight

Ok i slept and am still alive... i think its time to open UNDER THE MAGICAL HEALING LIGHT OF DAY

Okay...im going to open it....

Folks... there’s no more bags in there. Just this creepy ass bookcase pressed RIGHT NEAR THE DOOR

For more context, my house is some haunted shit. This is steps to my BASEMENT

Yup, nothings going to murder you down here!

Imagine being a kid and having to do laundry by yourself down here...

Oh, and this is where my friend Elliot and I once found A MYSTERIOUS DOOR WITH A NUMBER ON IT BEHIND A FAKE WALL... inside? ... a prohibition era booze hideaway. We kept some of the bottles!

Our “play room” as kids i swear to god was this damn attic...

Things are too scary so heres some eggs benedict I just made!

I am now going to ask my mom about the noises in the side attic (which I keep trying to spell "attack")

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I just investigated with my mom. Her, immediately: "Oh I thought I put that bookcase in the corner."

NOPE. FUCK THAT. OUT. DONE.

END THREAD.

MOVES OUT. BURNS HOUSE. SALTS EARTH.

I've been thinking about this spooky fun thread and the problem is that I've never been someone who can leave well enough alone.

For I could talk about all the usual conclusions people make when it comes to "Haunted New England Stories" and I think it's unsurprising that this beautiful, old, odd wooded land with their little cute colonial houses are full of old puritanical ghosts.

The kinds leftover for archaic witch burnings and silent vows. And so I could talk about how the weird noise in my side attack ties into some deeper external lore that fits the area to a T...

But the problem is that it's all just an achingly clear metaphor. The houses are just like human beings, projecting normalcy and quaintness, but actually filled demons of regret, pain, secrets, fear, and the barren parts of stone that hide within.

Most of the time, they're all gathering cobwebs with a dusty forgotten bookshelf that's been left behind. No, these aren't external fears, these are the parts within ourselves.

And the simple truth is that New England isn't haunted...

New Englanders are.