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Watching Harry Potter & Philosphers whatever for the first time fully and I’m astounded at the number of Tories
Harry, Hermoine, the ones who kept him under the stairs, Maggie Smith, none of you are free of sin
Draco is king of the Tories. He’s a walking LinkedIn viral post.
Alan Rickman’s hair is a LEWK
Prof. Quirrell is repping stammering culture and I stan
Owls are an inefficient method of mail delivery and borders on animal cruelty. In this essay, I will
Onto the chamber of secrets, and Colin is a centrist.
Second movie and again Harry Potter & co use 0 detective skills to figure out who the heir of slytherin is, but instead go with a hunch based on the most shady looking bastard. Anyway my money’s on Dobby
‘Dobby has to iron his hands’ ummm nobody told you to do that
Harry Potter can talk to snakes? haha wait till you get to uni mate it’s common hahah u ok hun x
Maybe the heir of slytherin were the friends we made along the way
Dumbledore’s a fuckin nonce for Gryffindor ain’t he
Onto the prisoner of Kasabian and Miss Trunchball literally just got brutally murdered
Dementors: *literally sucks the soul out of Harry until he faints*
Dumbledore: yeah mate come through stay round have a fucking laugh
Dumbledore: yeah mate come through stay round have a fucking laugh
Dementors are hormones, Azkaban is puberty, harry is gay, confirmed
Gary Oldman’s been in this film for 30 seconds and he’s already put in the best performance of the three films, wig snatched
I can’t believe it’s been 14 years since them Dementor slags sucked Sirius’ soul, RIP
Sirius may not have been guilty for what he was imprisoned for, but he’s definitely not innocent.
He’s 100% sniffed a few seats in his time, the absolute weapon
He’s 100% sniffed a few seats in his time, the absolute weapon
Literally every single major British actor is in Harry Potter. Meanwhile Andy Serkis be like
Order of the Phoenix time and bloody hell Harry Potter has severe PTSD. You can magic-up chocolate frogs but a good therapist is too far, apparently
Seamus 100% voted UKIP because he was radicalised by a YouTube comment on a flat-earth video
Dumbledore: We have a new Professor of Dark Arts!
LITERALLY EVERYBODY ELSE:
LITERALLY EVERYBODY ELSE:
I’d hatefuck Bellatrix so just jot that down x
dude’s name is mundungus, his parents are absolute illnesses
Hagrid in his hut during the battle of Hogwarts:
fuck right off did harry & ginny, and hermoine & Ron decide to have kids at the same time. On the phone during conception ahaha absolute freaks
