Unpopular opinion: Blizzard& #39;s writing staff are hacks who are able to disguise it by putting exactly one (1) highly relatable trait into each character they make
Pharah: Loves her mom
Ana: Mom goals
Soldier 76: Lol he& #39;s everyones dad amirite
DVa: Literally every 90s gamer girl stereotype
Tracer: & #39;M FR& #39;M ESSEX LUV
Reinhardt: BoisterousBruiser.tvtrope
Junkrat: STRAYA M8, MAD MAX KANGAROO?
Roadhog: BDSM lovers horny on main
Reaper: CRAWLING
Ana: Mom goals
Soldier 76: Lol he& #39;s everyones dad amirite
DVa: Literally every 90s gamer girl stereotype
Tracer: & #39;M FR& #39;M ESSEX LUV
Reinhardt: BoisterousBruiser.tvtrope
Junkrat: STRAYA M8, MAD MAX KANGAROO?
Roadhog: BDSM lovers horny on main
Reaper: CRAWLING
Thrall: NOBLE. WARRIOR. RACE.
Grom: NOBLE. WARRIOR. RACE. but drank bad soup once
Jaina: Girls can TOO be president
Arthas: FEARLEADSTOANGERANGERLEADSTOHATEHATELEADSTOSUFFERING
Varian Wrynn: I have a son
Anduin Wyrnn: I had a dad
Tyrande: NOBLE. WARRIOR. RACE. but with ears
Grom: NOBLE. WARRIOR. RACE. but drank bad soup once
Jaina: Girls can TOO be president
Arthas: FEARLEADSTOANGERANGERLEADSTOHATEHATELEADSTOSUFFERING
Varian Wrynn: I have a son
Anduin Wyrnn: I had a dad
Tyrande: NOBLE. WARRIOR. RACE. but with ears
Malfurion: Sure do love my hot elf wife
Illidan: Man I sure wish I had a hot elf wife
Gul& #39;dan: Orcs were mean to me, time to blow up every world twice
Cairne: I& #39;m literally the only well-written character in this game
Baine: Well time to ruin that lol
Illidan: Man I sure wish I had a hot elf wife
Gul& #39;dan: Orcs were mean to me, time to blow up every world twice
Cairne: I& #39;m literally the only well-written character in this game
Baine: Well time to ruin that lol
Garrosh: I& #39;m literally a walking example of every aspect of toxic masculinity but the writers still spent half a decade trying to portray me sympathetically
Kael& #39;Thas: We were genocided so we better ally with the people who did the genocide
Magni: Does anyone remember I exist
Kael& #39;Thas: We were genocided so we better ally with the people who did the genocide
Magni: Does anyone remember I exist
Raynor: every_Nathan_Fillion_character.archetype
Tychus: AW YEAH AH& #39;M TEXAN
Arcturus: What if Hitler was a role model though
Valerian: I& #39;m the son of a monarch and I literally look exactly like Arthas, hahaha I& #39;m sure that won& #39;t come up at all
Tychus: AW YEAH AH& #39;M TEXAN
Arcturus: What if Hitler was a role model though
Valerian: I& #39;m the son of a monarch and I literally look exactly like Arthas, hahaha I& #39;m sure that won& #39;t come up at all
Zeratul: Sho& #39;zak mak nul?
Illidan: Ana& #39;doraenador!
Kael& #39;Thas: Ié shera& #39;do.
Thrall: Lok& #39;regar, no& #39;gar!
Artanis: En taro Tassadar!
Blizzard: [laughs in Blizzardese]
Illidan: Ana& #39;doraenador!
Kael& #39;Thas: Ié shera& #39;do.
Thrall: Lok& #39;regar, no& #39;gar!
Artanis: En taro Tassadar!
Blizzard: [laughs in Blizzardese]
Come to think of it, "only genocided a little bit because they were very angry" basically describes every single Blizzard anti-hero https://twitter.com/ValeFuchs/status/1029093098868097024">https://twitter.com/ValeFuchs...
Tyrande: Yo Alextrasza can you fix Nordrassil please
Alextrasza: CBA TBH
Malfurion: Yo Ysera can you do something about the Emerald Dream
Ysera: Eh effort
Fandral: Yo Nozdormu can you give us our immortality back
Nozdormu: I can
Fandral: Will you
Nozdormu: I dunno will I?
Alextrasza: CBA TBH
Malfurion: Yo Ysera can you do something about the Emerald Dream
Ysera: Eh effort
Fandral: Yo Nozdormu can you give us our immortality back
Nozdormu: I can
Fandral: Will you
Nozdormu: I dunno will I?
Titans: Okay Neltharion, guard the deep places of the Earth, and whatever you do do not listen to the whispers of the Old Ones
Neltharion: Okay
Old Ones: Listen to our whispers
Neltharion (becoming Deathwing): Seems legit
Neltharion: Okay
Old Ones: Listen to our whispers
Neltharion (becoming Deathwing): Seems legit
Okay Twitter what other Extremely Distinct Blizzard Characters should I do
Kel& #39;Thuzad: Spreading plague to own the libs
Genn Graymane: We need to Make Gilneas Great Again, many fine people have told me this, you wouldn& #39;t believe it
Saurfang: SUPER. HONORABLE. WARRIOR. RACE.
Hogger: I& #39;m responsible for a whole lot of people being furries
Genn Graymane: We need to Make Gilneas Great Again, many fine people have told me this, you wouldn& #39;t believe it
Saurfang: SUPER. HONORABLE. WARRIOR. RACE.
Hogger: I& #39;m responsible for a whole lot of people being furries
Bastion: What if R2D2 had Vietnam flashbacks
Mei: Going to make you really conflicted about your fetish for Asian girls
Hanzo: Dishonoured Japanese Man Seeks Redemption
Genji: Cool Story Bro
Brigitte: I am LITERALLY two of the other characters welded together
Mei: Going to make you really conflicted about your fetish for Asian girls
Hanzo: Dishonoured Japanese Man Seeks Redemption
Genji: Cool Story Bro
Brigitte: I am LITERALLY two of the other characters welded together
Widowmaker: I& #39;m from a group previously thought to be good guys later revealed to have serious moral issues. I was subjected to a horrifying transformation by my sworn enemies and now I work for them
Sylvannas: Hey you stole my thing
Kerrigan: What do you mean YOUR thing
Sylvannas: Hey you stole my thing
Kerrigan: What do you mean YOUR thing
Torbjorn: I& #39;m not a dwarf!
[ literally one Blizzard anniversary later ]
Torbjorn: I& #39;m king of the dwarves
[ literally one Blizzard anniversary later ]
Torbjorn: I& #39;m king of the dwarves
Rory Swann: I& #39;m not a dwarf, I& #39;m just very short, have an affinity for machines and physical labour, have a beard, have a distinctly Scottish-American accent and am modelled in the exact same style Blizzard always models their dwarves
If I can be honest I completely understand why certain Blizzard characters will never be in Heroes of the Storm
It would give the fucking game away
It would give the fucking game away
Protoss: We& #39;re a race of long-lived, elegant, etherally beautiful humanoid beings with exceptional arcane power whose downfall came because we were too dogmatic, relied too much on tradition, treated humans like idiots and ignored signs of impending disaster
High Elf: Big mood
High Elf: Big mood
Zerg: So it turns out that we were created by a dark being of unspeakable power as a tool to destroy the known universe, only to be discarded when we were no longer useful
Undead Scouge: *lights cigarette* Buddy, let me tell you something...
Undead Scouge: *lights cigarette* Buddy, let me tell you something...
Terran Dominion: We became so enmeshed in bickering that we were totally unready to face the threats of a harsh and hostile universe when it came time to pay the piper
Alliance: Dude if you& #39;re going to copy my homework at least fucking change some of the words
Alliance: Dude if you& #39;re going to copy my homework at least fucking change some of the words
Karax: I am literally not a dwarf, I& #39;m a Protoss, but since I work with machines they still made me noticeably shorter and stockier than the other Protoss and gave me a fucking beard
Alarak: I& #39;m the de-facto leader of a renegade splinter faction from a group that upheld order and balance. My favourite colours are black and red and I teleport and shoot lightning and throw stuff around with my mind
Reaper: This guy is so good at character design
Reaper: This guy is so good at character design
Olaf: Wait, doesn& #39;t that make us the only truly original characters Blizzard have ever designed?
Erik: Wait, no, look, I& #39;m a dwarf
Baleog: FUCK
Erik: Wait, no, look, I& #39;m a dwarf
Baleog: FUCK
Fandral Staghelm: If I were to just plant World Trees EVERYWHERE, that would surely fix everything
Narrator& #39;s Voice: It actually ruined everything instead
[4,500 years later]
Fandral Staghelm: Guys, I have this amazing idea
Narrator& #39;s Voice: It actually ruined everything instead
[4,500 years later]
Fandral Staghelm: Guys, I have this amazing idea
Night Elf: President Malfurion, a power-hungry Night Elf who you used to be exceptionally close to has gone insane and is endangering the world, what do we do?
Malfurion: Why does this seem so familiar
Malfurion: Why does this seem so familiar
People are doing their own and they& #39;re so good https://twitter.com/ReagentTroika/status/1029418555815677960">https://twitter.com/ReagentTr...
This one is also extremely on-point https://twitter.com/EllieRloche/status/1029416859223973888">https://twitter.com/EllieRloc...
Hammond is everything bad about Overwatch and Blizzard writing and design in general literally condensed in to a metal sphere