friendly reminder since this is going around again: DO NOT EAT THE RICH!
it's called bio-magnification, people! the rich are at the top of the food chain, so they accumulate toxins from their food at a greatly increased rate.
Instead, /compost/ the rich. https://twitter.com/hels/status/1012449490396237824

composting the rich will allow all the accumulated toxins (like heavy metals! do you know how much expensive seafood the rich eat? mercury up the kazoo!) to be diluted or removed.
Then you can use the fertile soil to grow clean, healthy crops.

also it's not specific to "the rich" but you really shouldn't eat humans anyway, or even anything too close to us evolutionary, which means all the apes really.
The more similar you are biologically to your food, the easier it is for you to catch a disease off it.

and while cooking the meat will get rid of a lot of stuff, prions will just laugh and eat holes in your brain.
You can't overthrow the bourgeois and guillotine the aristocracy if you can't even stand because kuru has reduced your nervous system to mush.

it's basically a form of Mad Cow Disease but for humans. A specific protein in your brain can mis-fold, and in such a way that it causes other proteins to misfold in the same way. It accumulates plaques in your brain, full of proteins that aren't working right.

and since it's protein, it doesn't die when you cook it, unless you cook it until the consistency of charcoal.
So remember, don't eat the rich, don't eat any brains, but compost them for safe, sustainable, healthy revolutions.

in any case, while prion diseases are the scary ones, the bio-magnification is the silent killer.
You've got a crop grown in some slightly unclean soil. It's OK, crops can handle a bit of mercury, lead, or arsenic. But it ends up in the planet, in small amounts.

you feed the crop to some herbivore, like a cow, sheep, or chicken.
it gets some lead or mercury or arsenic. But that's okay, it can handle a bit.
but it is eating these slightly contaminated plants all its (short) life, and there's now more in the animal than was in the plant

then you slaughter the animal, prepare it into steak, lambchops, or chicken parmesan, and feed it to some rich dude.
It's slightly contaminated still, but that's ok, humans can handle it at some levels, too.
but he's eating it all his life.

it's slowly accumulating in all his fat cells, at a slow rate. since it's safely kept there and not all circulating around his bloodstream, it's not causing any huge negative effects.
But then The Revolution Is Begin and you go and eat him.

guess what: you just had 50 years of Rich Guy Meals worth of bio-accumulated toxins all dumped into your digestive system all at once!

so instead, compost the rich. The bacteria, protozoa, and fungi in compost will dilute and destroy the toxins. The end result? relatively clean, fertile soil, perfect for planting new crops in. Those crops will be safe to eat, since you'll only get small levels of toxins.

You sometimes see this bio-accumulation nastiness stuff happen when people lose a lot of weight in a short period, because some nasty chemicals like pesticides will accumulate in your fat.
The doses you're exposed are small enough not to hurt you at the time...

but you suddenly drop 50 pounds and all the pesticides that accumulated in those 50 pounds of fat all hit your system again, at all once. and that can be too big of an accute dose.

in any case, the #1 reason you shouldn't eat the rich is because of how much they love expensive seafood. seafood tends to have high mercury levels, and mercury is not an element you want to fuck with.

but as long as you eat only small amounts of mercury at a time, it's not going to reach toxic levels... but it might accumulate.
Then someone comes along and eats your rich ass, and WHOOPS now they have mercury poisoning.

so yes. if you take away anything from this silly, silly thread:
COMPOST THE RICH.

Wikipedia has a fun diagram about how mercury biomagnifies up the food chain.
Just imagine this little cartoon but with "rich dude" eating the halibut, and then "the revolutionaries" eating the rich dude, but with Xs over their eyes.

in any case, I'd like to point out (because of recent events and, you know, the law) that this thread is in no way intended to suggest you should compost (or eat) the rich.

This is primarily intended to take the (already hyperbole) call to "eat the rich" and share some science knowledge in a humorous way.
Eating or composting a person is still murder, and yes they still count as a person if they're rich.

so don't go out and kill any rich people because of this. that's not the point.

But if you ever find yourself in the situation where you and your fellow comrades have just killed some capitalist pig and someone suggests "LET'S EAT THEM! EAT THE RICH!", say NO.

instead, compost the rich.

because your revolution should be a healthy and environmentally friendly one.