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Things my Students Say and I Shouldn’t Laugh But I Accidentally Do: A Thread
Student 1: Mrs. Lyons do you still watch Nickelodeon?
Student 2: She doesn’t watch tv, you idiot. She fucking READS.
Student 2: She doesn’t watch tv, you idiot. She fucking READS.
Student: Hey Mrs. Lyons! Do you know that the word around the school is that you bad??
Me: What?? What did I do??
Student: No!!! Not like you’re a bad teacher. “Bad” like you’re hot!!!
Me: What?? What did I do??
Student: No!!! Not like you’re a bad teacher. “Bad” like you’re hot!!!
This boy walks into my class with A TON of flowers, candy, Valentine’s gifts.
His friend: Did your girl get you ALL OF THAT?!
Boy: Yeah
His friend: What did you get her?
Boy: . . .
His friend: Omfg you didn’t get her anything?!
Boy: shut the fuck up before I beat your ass
His friend: Did your girl get you ALL OF THAT?!
Boy: Yeah
His friend: What did you get her?
Boy: . . .
His friend: Omfg you didn’t get her anything?!
Boy: shut the fuck up before I beat your ass
Overheard as I walked to my classroom this morning.
Boyfriend: Hey!
Girlfriend:
Boyfriend: Are you mad at me??!
Girlfriend:
Boyfriend: We’ve been at school for TEN SECONDS. What did I do now?!
Boyfriend: Hey!
Girlfriend:
Boyfriend: Are you mad at me??!
Girlfriend:
Boyfriend: We’ve been at school for TEN SECONDS. What did I do now?!
Student: Hey Mrs. Lyons, I think I’ve seen your picture before.
Me: ?
Student: Yeah, it was in the dictionary. Under gorgeous.
https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="🙃" title="Upside-down face" aria-label="Emoji: Upside-down face">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="🙃" title="Upside-down face" aria-label="Emoji: Upside-down face">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="🙃" title="Upside-down face" aria-label="Emoji: Upside-down face">
Me: ?
Student: Yeah, it was in the dictionary. Under gorgeous.
My juniors: Hey Mrs. Lyonez, have you ever done a keg stand?
Me: Y’all know I’m your teacher right
Me: Y’all know I’m your teacher right
Student
- Refuses to do work
- Distracts EVERYONE
- I assign a LONG practice test bc of all the noise
- Everyone gets mad at him bc now they have more work
- He gets mad at me bc everyone is mad at him
- Throws test away
Student at the end of class: Mrs. L, look at the board :(
- Refuses to do work
- Distracts EVERYONE
- I assign a LONG practice test bc of all the noise
- Everyone gets mad at him bc now they have more work
- He gets mad at me bc everyone is mad at him
- Throws test away
Student at the end of class: Mrs. L, look at the board :(
I have a student that doesn’t EVER stop talking & every time I yell at him to shut up, he looks me right in the eyes, and slowly mouths, “I love you.”
I can’t with these kids anymore where’s my spring breakhttps://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="🤦🏻♀️" title="Woman facepalming (light skin tone)" aria-label="Emoji: Woman facepalming (light skin tone)">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="🤦🏻♀️" title="Woman facepalming (light skin tone)" aria-label="Emoji: Woman facepalming (light skin tone)">
I can’t with these kids anymore where’s my spring break
Student 1: Smoking cigarettes SLAPS.
Student 2: I guess lung cancer must slap too.
Student 2: I guess lung cancer must slap too.
Student: Missus, what are we doing tomorrow?
Me: Well I’m not going to be here tomorrow.
Student: What??? We have a sub?? Ugh. I won’t even come.
Me: I thought y’all like when you have a sub.
Student: Nah, not for you.
brb heart melting
Me: Well I’m not going to be here tomorrow.
Student: What??? We have a sub?? Ugh. I won’t even come.
Me: I thought y’all like when you have a sub.
Student: Nah, not for you.
brb heart melting
