Thread by @yagurlbb, Officially making a thread of the things preschoolers say to me [...]

brie

yagurlbb

Officially making a thread of the things preschoolers say to me

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*takes them outside to play and tells them to not play in the cold water*
Student: *walks up to me with a soaked sleeve* “My sleeve is wet”
Me: “were you playing in the water?”
Student: “no”
Me: “How did it get so wet?”
Student: “the wind just dropped all this water down there”

*students coloring at the table*
Student: “so if I shove this marker down my throat will I choke and die?”
Me: “you will get very hurt please don’t do that!”
Student: “so I will choke and die?”
Me: “please don’t put the marker in your mouth”
Student: *continues coloring*

Student: “me and so and so have a crush on each other”
Me: “do you know what a crush is?”
Student: “it’s like a mom and dad... I think it’s love???”....”Anyways hes my boyfriend”

Student: “Miss Brie I think I pooped my pants”
Me: “are you sure” *checks* “....No you didn’t? You’re all good”
Student: “oh yeah sorry ... must have just been those farts!!!!”

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Student: “miss Brie guess what time I’m leaving today!!!”
Me: “what time?”
Student: “100 o’clock!!”
Me:”... when’s that?”
Student:”I don’t know”

Student: “guess what dream I had last night.”
Me: “what?!”
Student: “a staple was stuck in my foot”
Me: “...ouch how did that happen?”
Student: “no it didn’t hurt it was a dream. A staple was in my foot in my dream. I didn’t feel it for real”

Me: “alright guys what’s your favorite food?”
Student: “I’d gave to say sheep food”
Me: “sheep food?”
Student: “yep”

Student: “.... said I have a booger coming out that looks like a worm can you please get it”

Student: “miss Brie... how do you make water?”
Me”.....we don’t make it. It’s natural.”
Student. “......”
Me:”......”

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Student: “I had a dream about my mom today!”
Me: “that’s great!”
Student: “yeah but her lips were REALLY chapped in my dream so...”
Me: “...”

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